DanFiction^2

Angry Intentions

"Could you kill yourself with a kazoo?"

~Julius Caeser

Dan's Pov:

So we walked back to Arin's house, the whole time he held my hand. His palms were clammy, I knew he was nervous but he didn't make a single retort till we arrived on the doorstep. He squeezed my hand tightly.

"Hey," I pressed my temple to his, "I'll be there the whole time, okay?" Arin leaned against me. I knew that this would be hard on him. The least I could do is stand with him. I will be his rock for when this gets hard, always ready to catch him should he fall. He let go of my hand and rang the bell.

Suzi answered immediately, just as she had three hours ago. She was wearing a dress that hung just below her knees, floral patterned. She saw Arin and immediately grasped him in a bear hug, I knew she was crying and the pain hit me instantly.

Arin hugged her back, he was a stone and she was the river. I let my gaze wander from them, selfish guilt washing over me at the show of affection. Maybe a tinge of jealousy, but that was squashed when I saw Arin's expression. He was distancing himself, separating the mind from the body.

"Arin, I was so worried! You didn't come home, and Dan asked where you were. I got so afraid that something happened." She was shuttering, trying to get her sentence out with no tears. I too started to let my mind leave my body, I didn't want to hurt her. She wiped her tears and ushered us in. The living room was clean, although as chaotic as usual.

Arin took a long moment, looking around the room. He took a deep breath in and plopped down on the couch. Taking in the surroundings as they are, for the last time. Suzi sat beside him, her brows furrowed, she knew something was wrong, that's on me. Arin looked between us two, first Suzi then me.

"Suzi, there's something that I recently realized. I think I might be gay?" Arin, always direct in these situations, was as blunt as he felt necessary. I tried to keep my eyes on him, but I wanted to look to her. She, facing forwards, had her eyes closed and lips are drawn. She stayed like that for a long moment.

"Is it me?" She was so quiet, I could barely hear her.

"No! It's not you, it's just... I realized that I'm in love with someone, a guy, and have been for a while." Arin dragged on as Suzi gripped her flowery dress, I couldn't read her expression.

"Is it... Is it him?" She didn't have to point, gesture, anything. We all knew who she was referencing.

Arin hesitated, and that was all the confirmation Suzi needed. She rose to her feet, small tears falling on her cheeks. And to the kitchen, she walked. Arin stood to fallow, I, however, waited on the cusp of the living room to the kitchen. Arin studdered explanations, tried to excuse his feelings. While she grabbed the bottle of tequila and poured a shot, downing it she went for another but instead of a shot swigged the entire bottle.

"I don't understand, what did I do? That would make you fall in love with him?" She sipped more, "and don't give me that 'it isn't your fault' bullshit. It had to be me, for you to go for him." Anger was raging within her, her gaze murderous. She picked up her shot glass, and with no remorse.

Threw it at me.

I felt the impact, the floor, heard Arin's voice. But everything faded, slowly, to black.