DanFiction^2

Paint wars

"When Dan was a kid, he had to get his porn out of a dumpster behind a seven-eleven"

~Alex Jones, moments after gay frog rant (producers removed it because it was too controversial, wake up America) 

This chapter is not serious, obviously, also 13-year-old child; this gay porn please leave.

Dan's POV:

I cannot emphasize to you how much I want a cabbage flavored Steak'n Shake milkshake. Okay so we're sitting there barbeque sauce on my and Airn's Titties, he looks super cute, elbow deep in an oreo milkshake.  He' s fisting that bitch like a farmer would a very confused cow, and he looks super cute covered in white stuff (I wish it was MY white stuff and NOT that BITCH STAKK SHAK) 

(We are kidding, please stake n' shake, we love you an really need animal crossing.) 

"UWUUUUUUUUUUUUUH" Arin echoed, the rest of the restaurant looked on in horror. But, this being California, MANY people looked away and excused Arin as batshit crazy. I could now understand why he was banned from 68 consecutive stake n' shakes. 

Arin shook me awake, his expression is light-hearted. "Dude, you fell asleep on your cheesy fries," I reached a hand to my face and found, yup, I'm covered in melted cheddar cheese, "I didn't have the heart to wake you up till I realized you were in a mountain of cheese; let's get you cleaned  up, you look like a fucking disgrace." He looked like my father at that moment (do I have a daddy kink?) Least to say we quietly went to the bathroom.

In the bathroom, Arin gingerly cleans my cheesy ass face with a damp paper towel. It didn't get in my hair, thank christ,  but as he wiped the cheese from my forehead he chortled. 

"Whatever you were dreaming about must have been fucking hilarious, you uwu'd into your fries." He went into  a deep explanation on how I ended up falling into my fries and then uwu'd with no warning, also there was a portion of my fever dream where I angrily cursed out steak and shake AND IT ALMOST BECAME THE 69TH STEAK AND SHAKE TO BAN GAME GRUMPS. 

Regardless, we paid for and left the steak and shake to go to Lowe's for some paint. Arin really likeLowe's, it makes him feel like a kid and we spend like a whole minute in the lightbulb action talking about how Arin would be the Fairy with the biggest dick and then went to get our paint. 

We had chosen "Wanda, that bitch ain't slick, pink and Spousal abuse blue' but it should be known it was between that and 'Boner Pill Blue' which Arin insisted he needed. 

But we had chosen our paints and headed home to paint our new room. 

~~~

As we stood in our bedroom, we had the can of blue paint open and the mattress laying in the living room on the floor. As we started painting, I dipped my hand in the can of paint and ran my fingers down the back of his spine, and put a small dot on his cheek. He turns to me with a very offended expression. 

"Daniel." I lost my fucking mind with laughter. "If you just put blue paint on my tiny little boy cheeks, I will annihilate you where you stand." He was clearly fighting laughter but, on jah bro? He was about to be bouncing all up on my dick, he wipes his check to find the aforementioned blue paint, and makes dead eye contact with me. 

"You think you've won? You think I'll give up because my  baby cheeks are slathered in blue?" He dipped his hand in the blue, approaching me with no hesitation. 

"Arin, we can talk about this," I said, backing my ass to the wall, "you don't want to make my ass blue, you  KNOW what happens if my ass is blue."  He continues to pursue me, his gaze directly on my beautiful ass.