Accepting: Hidden Self

Chapter 22

AN/ The pic kinda speaks for this chapter XD

Yeosang

         After seeing San come out of his room and collect his things he turned, disappearing in a could of purple mist. I am shocked, just like everyone else, sure he gets sulky, but we have never seen him mad before. I look over to Wooyoungie, and he just stares at where San was standing, eyes wide and quiet.

         "Wooyoungie? Are you two okay?" I ask, going to sit with him

         "I asked him about our connection and his walls, I didn't know it would make him so mad." he mutters, I almost don't hear him. He looks at me, his eyes are red, but there are no tears, just confusion.

         "It'll be alright, he's always like this. Remember that it's not your fault, he has issues opening up." I tell him, pulling him into a hug. He gives a deep sigh and pulls away.

         "Thanks, but I need to find a way into San's heart... " he says with determination.

         "What do you mean?" I hear Mingi ask from the doorway of Yunho and San's room.

         "I found a thread, and followed it." Wooyoung says looking over at Mingi, who now looks more than a little shocked.

         "Wait, you saw the thread?!" SeongHwa and Mingi both yell, looking at Wooyoung. I see him looking between the two in confusion.

         "Your bond has to be incredibly strong for you to even see the thread, let alone follow it. Where did it lead?" Mingi asks, sitting down on the other side of Wooyoung.

         "I touched it, and followed it to a new space, seeing what I assume are surface thoughts of San's. I went further, wondering what he thought of me, and ran into a wall, behind it I saw something, but I don't really remember what I saw." he says, but I can tell that he's lying, about what I don't know, but I know he is lying.

         "Wow, that must've been really weird for him." SeongHwa says getting his things ready for us to leave.

         "What do you mean?" Woo asks, and Mingi looks to SeongHwa too.

         "Well how would you feel if you had someone poking around in your head? If you couldn't get in it's probably something he doesn't want you to know about, or something he wants to forget exists." he explains, looking at the two.

         After everyone is in the car we head to KQ, Wooyoung sitting in the back next to me, and Jungho on the other side of me. I try to figure out what Wooyoungie is thinking, but he seems to be lost in his own world. By time we arrive at the company everyone has had a nap, and is excited to practice.

:@:

Wooyoung

         In the van all I can think about is the image of San smirking at me from behind the wall. He was happy to see me, but the look he had didn't seem friendly. I am worried about what San is hiding from me, but I know his intentions are always good. I sigh heavily when we pull up at KQ, I'm not sure what we are going to find when we see San. Is he still mad, is he having a crying fit?

         I get out of the car grabbing my things, and walk with Yeosang, hugging him as we go. When we get to the door, he shakes me off, and I look over his shoulder to see San sitting on a bench in the lobby. He is leaning over, elbows on his knees, hands interlaced, and resting his head on them.

         He looks nervous, but when he hears the doors open his head snaps up. I can see a smile on his face, and it feels weird after seeing him on the other side of that wall. I smile nervously and wave to him, but I guess he can feel the hesitation, since he doesn't come to me with a hug.

         He stands up and leaves for the practice room, but as he turns I notice his hands are bandaged. He can't be injured, he heals faster than SeongHwa and the wolves. I think as I look at the others who just seem confused by San's demeanor.

         "Is he okay? He doesn't seem mad, but he doesn't seem happy either." Jungho asks. I shake my head, not knowing what to answer.

         We all get ready and head to the practice room, where we see San sitting down, looking like he is already exhausted. Concerned I go over to him, and help him up, but he shakes his head at me.

         "I'm fine, just get your stretching done, I don't want you hurting yourself during practice." he tells me, giving a small, sad smile. I go over and stretch with the others, but keep an eye on San, watching how he is. I can see when he goes to stand up that his hands are hurting him. Did he really hurt himself?

:@:

San

         Woo seems distant, and it seems like I am scaring him, so I decide to stay back for a while, hoping that his fears will calm before I can talk to him. I leave for practice after seeing him so nervous about greeting me.

         After stretching a bit I feel as though something hit me in my chest. I grab the rosary, hoping for the feeling to pass. I can see myself in the mirror, but it's not me, it's my Darker side, laughing at me.

         "Go away! I don't need you! You've ruined everything you touch you bastard!" I yell at it, hoping that Mingi didn't hear. I collapse to the ground, covering my ears as he laughs at me. Why can't I escape him? He is always here.

         My train of thought is broken when I hear the others heading my way. I look in the mirror again, and he is gone. I lean my back against the mirror and sigh, now panting heavily from the encounter. I know I need to accept him, but if I do then Woo will hate me. I think as I try to compose myself.

         I watch as Woo and the others come in, all of them seem concerned about me. Seeing Woo come closer I wave him away, I don't want him to know how much my mind is trying to hurt us.

         "I'm fine, you go get your stretches done. I don't want you getting hurt while practicing." I say to him, thankfully he doesn't fight me. I stand up, but hurt my bruised knuckles in the process, making me wince in pain. Should I take off the rosary? I think as I head towards the others.

          "You okay San?" Yunho asks, pointing to my hands.

          "Yeah, I busted up my hands earlier, I'll be fine later." I say and we head into our positions, getting ready to practice. While we practice I feel annoyed that the rosary keeps hitting me, so I take it off.

         Things go fine throughout our practice, so we order lunch. I sit on my own, and watch as Woo sits by Yeosang. He seems to sit peacefully, meditating on the world.

         I could feel something happening to my walls around my darker self, like someone chipping away at it. I pushed back against the intruder, just to see Wooyoung open his eyes. I look at him and feel something in me start to crumble.

         "Rose!! I am leaving, something happened!!" I yell to her, not caring if Mingi or Woo heard. I panic, feeling myself losing the fight with my Darker half. Why now?! Why?!

         I teleport out of the studio in a panic, and hope that I can get to my room in time.

AN/ You guys like cliff hangers... right?