Lover of mine ~ 5sos

Chapter 25 ~ High

*Contains mature language and drugs*

After leaving the eventful conversation with Sierra, I head into the lounge where everyone is sitting and talking.

I take a seat on the couch, sipping away at my drink. Everyone's busy in conversation, so I sit silently, listening in on the conversations.

Lost in my thoughts, I can't help looking at Calum. Although, I wish that chick wasn't all over him, gross.

I'm interrupted by Sierra, "Gawking much? Ew, Calum would never like you", she laughs and walks over to her friend that's all over Calum. She hands her a drink and whispers something in her ear.

A few minutes pass when I notice her get up from Calum and walk over to me. In the fakest voice, she starts to speak, "Hey, I'm Emily, it's so good to meet you! Sierra has told me so much about you! Huge fan".
She goes to sit down beside me, and while doing so, she tips the drink deliberately on me- making it out like it was an accident, apologising. I'm guessing that's what Sierra whispered in her ear.

I stand up, furious, "Are you serious?! Why would you do that?!".
She smirks at me, putting on an act, "I said I'm sorry, it was an accident".
I chuck the rest of my drink at her, "Oops, it was an accident, sorry love", she begins to cry.
Calum jumps in before I can do anything else to her, "Y/N why would you do that?! Grow up. Thanks, for ruining the night", he goes back over to her, pulling her into a hug.
I can't control my anger at this point, how dare he say that to me? "What the fuck Calum?! Stop thinking with your dick, just because you have a new toy, doesn't mean you can chuck your friends in the trash..", I stop, noticing everyone was looking at me, I sigh, "This whole night I've been ignored, the only person who's spoken to me was Sierra who insulted me and told me that no one wants me here- her friend then deliberately spills her drink on me and no one stood up for me", I grab my things and leave.

As soon as I leave, tears begin to roll down my cheeks. I can't believe none of the boys stood up for me, they're meant to be my friends, my fellow band mates, the people I spend 24/7 with. They're my world, and I'd do anything for them- I'm unsure if they'd do the same.

When I get back to my room, I can't calm down, my anxiety is through the roof, I begin breathing rapidly, heart pounding.

I'm having a panic attack.

I quickly search my bed side table. From the top drawer, I grab out some tobacco, papers and an old stash of marijuana. Hands shaking, I begin to roll a joint as best as I could.

I head out to the balcony, lighting it up, taking a long drag. I exhale, and repeat. I slowly start to calm down, my mind focusing on each inhale and exhale.

High as a kite, I head back inside.

Order some pizza and sat at my piano.

It's the perfect time to write some music.

"I hope you think of me high,
I hope you think of me highly,
When you're with someone else.
I know your friends all lie,
I know your friends don't like me,
They want you for themselves"...

Its simple, but I like it.
I'm just finishing the song off when there's a knock at the door, pizza must be here.

I open the door, Ashtons standing there, "Can I come in?".
I shrug, "It's your place too, you don't have to ask".
I head back to my my room, Ashton follows.
"I didn't mean you could follow me though.."
He grabs my arm, turning me around to face him, "I'm sorry Y/N, I should of been there supporting you. I over heard the girls talking about what happened in the bathroom, you were right, it wasn't an accident. I feel terrible, I should of believed you. Afterwards, they kept telling everyone that we should kick you out of the band, and that you're a terrible person. I came straight here, I'm sorry".
I smile weakly, pulling Ashton into a hug, "Thank you".

Thanks for reading xo