Lover of mine ~ 5sos

Chapter 32

I know I shouldn't get my hopes up with Calum, but I can't help it.
I've always had feelings for him; and although I have something amazing with Ashton, I can't help but wonder how things would be with Calum.
I can't believe he said what he said the other night but then went and signed a contract without speaking with me.
I feel bad for Ashton.
I know he understands my situation but I feel like I'm just playing Ashtons emotions, the same way Calum played mine, it's not fair.
I need to speak with them both.

It's late and we're recording in the morning, but I'm not going to be able to sleep if I don't sort things out.

I quietly leave my room, not waking Ashton.
The hallway is quiet, as I walk towards Calum's, the only sound is my footsteps.
I knock on his door.

Calum opens the door, rubbing his eyes, I must of woken him.

Calum yawns, "Y/N it's late, why are you here?".
I look him in the eyes, "Is it true? Did you sign a contract to be in a relationship with Emily?".
He sighs, walking out into the hallway and shutting the door, he whispers, "Y/N you know we are not allowed to talk about this- plus Emily doesn't know, so be quiet".
I knew it was true but I deep down, I was hoping he would tell me otherwise and sweep me off my feet or something.. I don't know.. it's stupid I guess.
I look down at my feet, I can't look at him, "Calum, I turned down my contract and gave away my rights to Lover of Mine, because after what you said the other night, I thought I should talk to you first.." I chuckle nervously, "I was stupid to believe you", I begin to walk off.
Calum follows after me, but I speed up my pace, "Y/N wait- let me explain, please, I love you!".
I pause, did he really just say that? I turn around, shoving him back, "No, Calum, you don't. If you did, you wouldn't of put me through any of this and you wouldn't of signed that contract".
He grabs my hand, "Y/N please, I had to sign that contract".
I pull my hand back, folding my arms, "They didn't force your signature. I should of just signed my contract, at least Ashton cares for me".
He scoffs, "Go on then, run back to Ashton, he could never love you like I do".
I sigh, "Maybe not, but at least he won't hurt me.. Goodnight Calum, I'll see you tomorrow".

I leave Calum in the hallway and go back to my room. I think it's for the best if Calum and I are just friends.

I pop my head into Ashtons room, he's asleep, Im sure I can talk to him in the morning.
I go to shut his door when a raspy voice speaks up, "Y/N?".
I walk in, sitting on his bed next to him, "I can't sleep, do you mind?", I gesture to the empty space beside him.
He rolls over, lifting his arm up.
I curl up into his chest, and I soon fall asleep.