SINFUL TOUCH || J.JK × Reader ✔

chapter 22 | Mature

My body is heating up, my face is burning, and my veins are throbbing. I don't feel good.

Noticing no reaction is coming from him, I peek up at his hands but see him fix his watch around his wrist. He takes a gulp of his drink to consume the entirety of the liquid and drops the glass back on the marbled surface for those sounds full of fragility to be heard through the house.

"Does your dad know about it?" he doesn't say anything else, hurting me without even realizing how badly my brain took this sort of cold answer. I tell him that I like him, and that's the only thing he says?

"Is that the only thing that matters to you?" I raise my teary eyes up to make it obvious he just shoot a bullet through my heart. "No," he straightens his back and exhales heavily, laying his tough hands over the kitchen island that separates us. "You know I cannot like you back, y/n."

I chuckle nervously but wipe my tears away. "I know that. I knew this would end like that anyway..."

"I'm not doing this to hurt you—"

"Do you like me back or not at all?" I dare to cut him off, even though I should not. I just need the answer to this, that's the only thing I want to know. He stares at me without saying anything but makes it worse for me. "Tell me the truth, Jungkook...please..." I beg him to give me his answer.

He breathes out, sharply, but grips the edge of the kitchen island. "I like you too, but nothing can happen."

"And why not...?" his words relieve me now that I know he feels the same. "If we like each other...why do we have to hold back?"

"There are many reasons why I cannot let anything happen between us. First of all, our parents, and your dad, in particular, will see it as a betrayal if I date his daughter when I'm almost the same age as he is," he uses this as a pretext when this doesn't matter to me. "Then the people, and the look they will give us if they see us hold hands, kiss, or hug. Think about your life on a daily basis if we live together. You'll leave the house at an early hour to go to school, but I'll already be gone for work, so I won't even be able to drive you there, you will barely see me in the morning, and once you'll be back home, I'll still be at work for at least one hour, and I won't be there to cook and make sure you eat well, that we're together—"

"I don't care, Jungkook..." I speak in an undertone, those details that he considers as some problems not seeming bad to me. When I think about the fact that he has to come back from work and be all alone in here, this breaks my heart so much that I would do anything to be the one there for him once he's back. At least, he would know that the one who loves him is waiting for him at home. "And even if you think like this, that you believe this won't work. Why don't we try...? If this doesn't work then all right, it doesn't, but you don't know without trying."

"If we do this, and that it works on one side only, this will hurt the other even more, y/n. It's not easy for me to do this and tell you all of those things but...I have to think about the future if we want to be together. I think about you and how hard this will be because you're young," he doesn't make himself pass before me when I only care about his own happiness. I know I'll be happy with him no matter what. "And what's the problem? I'm young but...I'll understand if you have to work and cannot be here all the time."

"When I say 'young', I mean you have some needs at that age, y/n. I know you probably don't want to talk about this, but at your age, I know sex is important for a couple. I know what happens when a woman isn't sexually satisfied, and as a man of thirty-two years old, who works a lot and feel exhausted whenever I'm back home, I won't be able to give you as much as a boy of your age would. This is going to ruin our relationship," the matter doesn't mean anything to me.