I See Your Soul [An Original Michael Jackson Love Story] ✔

Chapter 13: Remember the Rules

Monday, November 19, 1979

Although she wasn't opposed to it, Nicole never considered herself one for commitment. Not yet. But she didn't want to be the type of girl to date around either, knowing they often gained a poor reputation. Maybe she was just never meant to date at all? Sure, she pictured this new life in California to have a few suitors. A handful of dates with harmless flirtations would be fun! But here she was, barely 3 months in, with a boy--

THE boy.

Who was IN LOVE. 

With HER!?

Most would be happy, proud even, to run down the aisle into the arms of Michael Jackson. But not Nicole. She agreed to be his girlfriend because she liked him. She enjoyed the kissing and phone calls and butterflies in her stomach. But never would Nicole have agreed to falling in love.

It played on repeat in her mind, the ride back home after his confession of love. She was wearing one of his t-shirts and black sweatpants. The car was silent as Michael held her hand. She blamed her standoffishness on feeling tired and Michael never questioned it, he was tired too. She remembered the moment he parked. Insisting that he not walk her to the door, Nicole kissed him firmly, feeling like it would be the last time their lips would meet. Maybe the last time she'd see him at all. But Michael was oblivious. He was gentle and so sweet, still smiling when he squeezed her fingers. And when she said goodbye, he whispered back, "I love you," like it was the easiest, most natural thing for two people to say.

At first, the plan was to just go silent. Ignore his calls and faxes. No more rides to Hayvenhurst from Bill. She could essentially disappear. But after more consideration, Nicole remembered the power of this man. Michael had flowers sent to her new address a mere hours after she'd moved in. He could find her easily. And aside from that, it seemed cruel. Michael was sensitive and had always been kind. He opened his home and shared his family with her. She had no reason to be mean. She didn't want to break his heart... But Nicole had no other choice. 

The new plan would be to phase herself out. She'd make herself busy, packed with projects and tests and maybe join a couple extracurriculars. In no time Michael would forget that he'd fallen in love. And hopefully once she pulled the plug officially on their courtship, it would feel like a relief, not a heartbreak, for them both.

Two weeks had gone by without seeing each other. They spoke occasionally on the phone, but calls were often cut short by Nicole's excuses. She would fake a yawn, claiming to have woken up earlier than usual that morning. Or suddenly notice the time and remember an imaginary team meeting at the library. Again, Michael never seemed concerned. He had no reason to doubt or question her. He was proud that his girl was dedicated to school and committed to waking up at daybreak to reach her goals. Yes he missed her, but Michael thought Nicole missed him too.

If she were honest with herself, Nicole would admit she did, in fact, miss Michael too-- but now was not the time for honesty. It was the Monday before Thanksgiving. Nicole had the whole week off for a holiday break and she couldn't allow herself to stall any longer. Today would be the day, the perfect time to end this relationship before leaving to see her parents tomorrow. It would be much easier, for both of them, to mourn the breakup from a distance.