Pushed Aside

Thoughts and Firsts

Elliot's POV

It's been two days since I had my interview, and for some reason, I can't get the image of that guy out of my head. When I walked into the room, I felt this weird sort of spark flow through me, and when I saw green eyes staring at me I got.... lost.

I was glad when Darren lead me out of there and I'm a bit nervous about going to start my first day today. Hopefully the guy is actually chill and won't keep staring at me all day.

And hopefully he doesn't have a crush on me.

I have no problem with being gay, though the same can't be said for my parents, but that is not the lifestyle I live. I've never had to encounter letting a guy down and telling him I'm straight, and I hope this won't be my first. I would prefer not to make my first enemy from the guy that supposed to be showing me the ropes.

I'm sitting in the kitchen, only the light over the stove giving me guidance as I sit and do homework. My brin was too busy to fall back asleep once I woke up an hour ago and for some reason, I was feeling claustrophobic when I was laying in bed with Courtney. These past two days have just been weird in my head, but in our relationship as well. I don't know if it's me or her, but something has changed and it doesn't feel the same being with her anymore.

I turn my focus back to the paper in front of me that's due at the end of the semester. The whole thing is about change.

That's what the prompt says at the top: Change.

There's no explanation or guidelines just one word that I'm supposed to make sense out of and write for myself. Which is a lot easier said than done. As an art major, it's much easier to get what I have to say out in pictures and lines than in words, so this english class is sure to kick my ass this semester.

I'm doing some research in the word, deciding to go the more literal route just as I hear one of the doors open down the hallway. I expect it to be Miley's since he has to go to football workouts in an hour but the soft patter of feet let me know it's Bambi coming down the hall.

When she comes into the room, she gives me and smile before coming over to me and hoping up on the counter with the help of my hands in her hips.

"Hey, babe, you okay?" She asks me with her hand in my hair. I used to want to lean into her touch so bad, always loving how she knew whenever I needed the contact, but now, I only find the constant touching annoying.

"I'm okay. Just trying to get some work done before I get ready for my first day." I tell her and I sit and talk with her for a few minutes until I see that I have to be at work soon. I end the conversation swiftly before giving her a kiss to the forehead and standing up, taking my notes and my laptop with me back to my room, leaving her in the kitchen.

Though I know it's wrong and that I should just talk to her, I can't help but wish that the feelings that used to hit me so hard in the heart would return. I had plans of marrying Bambi and now.... now I don't know what I want.

I shake my head with a frown, not wanting to go down that road before I grab some clothes. I took my shower last night, so all I have to do is slip on the clothes and moisturize my body.

I spray on some cologne and snap on my watch before I'm grabbing what I need and shoving them in my pockets.

Once I check and double check that I have everything, I make my way back down the hallway and to the kitchen where I find Courtney still on the counter, her head lowered a bit. Not able to pass her with such a sad expression, I walk to her and give her a quick kiss on the forehead before lifting her eyes to meet mine.