ghosts ~ raven potter x draco malfoy

chapter twenty three: dynamics

⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING: discussion of suicide and depression.

Raven splashed water in his face, getting rid of the sweat that dripped down his forehead. He'd just finished a quidditch match, and Draco continued to pester him about what had happened the night before. He had noticed Raven wasn't back on time and was begining to become worried again.

Raven felt someone hold his hair back as the water dripped from his face into the sink, and he turned around to see his boyfriend.

"Are you going to tell me what happened last night?" Draco asked, letting go of Raven's hair and grabbing a black headband off the sink.

"No." Raven replied dryly, as the platinum blonde put the headband on him, holding back his black hair and showing his green eyes.

Draco stared at him, grabbing both his hands and holding them in front of him.

"I'm worried about you." Draco admitted, not looking Raven in the eyes and his face was red.

"I know." Raven said sadly. He let go of one of Draco's hands, while using the other to lead him out of the bathroom.

"Listen Draco." He began, as they both say on the blonde boy's bed.

"I've been feeling...well... rather existential." Raven said, causing Draco to raise an eyebrow.

"What does that mean?" He inquired.

"Well...it means that I feel that my life isn't important. That it doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things." Raven admitted.

"So...your feeling...depressed?"

"You could say that...I tried to...off myself last night..."

"WHAT!?" Draco yelled, standing up in shock.

"Raven, you should've told me! I want to help you! You could've...died." the last part, he said more quietly.

"I know...a boy named Cedric saved my life, if not for him...I would be dead." Raven said.

It was silent for a few moments, until Draco sat back down. He rested his hand on Raven's own hand.

"Please...talk to me...next time you feel that way..." He pleaded, with his partner.

"I'll try...I'm sorry I didn't tell you." Raven apologized, turning to face him.

"Don't apologize. I'm sorry I couldn't have been there to help you." Draco said, squeezing Raven's hand.

"You need not apologize either..." Raven told him. He cupped Draco's cheek, and began kissing him. The kiss was rather feverish, and made both of their stomachs turn inside out.

Slytherin had won their match against Ravenclaw, but that didn't seem to boost Raven's mood.

"I think you should tell Pot- ...your brother, about this." Draco suggested as the two parted.

"ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND!?" Raven screeched.

"No no no, not US I mean about you know...last night." Draco explained waving his hands around anxiously.

"Oh..." Raven said, his voice back to its original volume. He suddenly felt tired and drained of energy, his head fell to his boyfriend's shoulder.

"Did you just OD right now?" Draco joked causing the other male on him to gigle slightly.

Draco put his arm around Raven, and ran his hand through his hair.

"No, I just miss this." Raven said after a moment of silence. Draco and him hadn't gotten many of these moments recently due to Raven pulling back a bit because of his feelings, and because they didn't want anyone to find out about them. The only person who knew was Pansy, and she wouldn't say anything.

"I do too." Draco said, falling back onto the bed. He and Raven now lay embracing eachother on Draco's bed. The only sounds they could hear was each other's breathing, and muffled voices from the common room that almost sounded as if they were underwater.