The Sisters Of The Court

Chapter 63: Scarlett

St Petersburg, 1902

One year, One year since I've been free from the rape and abuse of that monster, Blessed Nickie annulled it as soon as Michael told him what had happened. And now I am free here, Or at least until Michael marries, Then I'll have to find somewhere else to go. I sit staring at the fire as I think about my son, My heart aches for his little body next to mine where I can hold and protect him from the dangers of the world. I should've never let George meet him, I'll hate him until the end of my days for taking my beautiful son from me. "A letter for you Madam," A servant  jerks me out of my thoughts as he comes up to me, I jump up and practically rip it open, "My Mama, I am seven today! I wish you could see how big I am getting, I heard mother say that too Eddie," I freeze as I read the lines, Mother? George's wife? I am his mother! I raised him for six years until he took him away from me! I am his only mother! "Leave me please," I dismiss the servant as I pace around the room holding the letter tightly in my hand. He has found a mother in George's wife? Will he forget about me?" I sit down at the writing table and quickly start writing back, "My Darling Little Duckie, You are getting so big and strong I am sure! And I know you are doing well in your lessons, I will send you a picture of us together so you can remember your home a little better, I give you the tightest squeeze my darling Duckie, Your mama." I slide in the picture of us when he was a baby and stamp it close angrily, I'll get my revenge on George, I swear it. "Natasha are you ready for dinner?" I jump and turn around to see Michael standing behind me dressed in elegant dinner wear that makes his tall figure look even more handsome- I jerk myself out of it "Of course," I smile and stand up, He has been so kind to me letting me stay here with Alice and Sergei "You look nice," He says softly as we walk to the dining room and a slight blush rises in my cheeks, I shouldn't be blushing I'm not interested in him I tell myself as I take my seat next to him. "Thank you Michael," I smile back at him as I drink my wine looking up from the brim of my cup and I see him swallow his desire for me, "I told, Call me Misha," He smiles at me encouragingly as I put my glass down as he looks at me intently, I bite my bottom lip nervously "Of course Misha-" Before I can finish my thought he puts both hands on my cheeks and kisses me passionately, He wraps his arms around my waist pulling me closer to his body. "What-" I utter surprised, I wouldn't think he would ever do something like this, He's always been so polite and gentleman like to me, "Shh," He mutters into my lips and deepens the kiss running his hand through my hair and something shifts in me and I kiss him back putting my hand on the back of his head. "Marry me," He mutters into my lips as he pulls away slightly looking into my eyes, marry him? He really wants to marry me? A nothing whore? Of course you fool, He's been in love with you for forever. I turn my head away slightly, "Marry me, Marry Me" The words ring in my head as My mind wanders to how kind he's always been to me and my children, Treated me with affection even when I've hurt and rejected him for his brother. And I realize I love him, Truly, My hear belongs to him now as his has always belonged to me. I look back into his beautiful and caress his cheek "I love you," I whisper, "I want to marry you," I smile as he hugs me as tightly as he can. "God, You're so perfect" He mutters into my shoulder, "I am not, I have hurt you much," I whisper as he pulls away from me and looks me in the eye, "That doesn't matter to me, I'll always love you," He rubs my cheek with his thumb as I smile, "Me too," I whisper before kissing him again gently on his lips.

A few days later I sit with Misha as he holds my hand tightly in the carriage as we drive to Alice's house. "Darling, I'm not going run away," I laugh as he kisses my hand gently as I admire his gentleness towards me, Finally a good man that I love and he loves me back that is determined to protect me and my children forever. "I never expected you too marry me," He mutters in my ear still holding my hand as a pang of guilt hits me, He deserves much better then me. "I love you now my darling,' I caress his cheek as we pull up to the house. He helps me out as I look up at the house, I've almost never been to their house in St Petersburg and I haven't seen Alice in more then a year. I take a deep breath and hold onto Misha's arm, "Don't be nervous my love she'll be happy for us," He kisses the side of my head as we walk inside and I can hear voices coming from the parlor as The maid leads us in, Probably Andrei or someone trying to get her money again, I don't wish for him to be here reminding my past as a whore in Moscow. I was grieving, Surely everyone can understand that, It's been two years anyways. I walk into the parlor and Immediately shiver as I see man sitting on the sofa with Alice. He towers even over Misha with striking eyes that go deep into my soul, I stare straight back at him without showing my discomfort, "Ah, Grand Duchess Natasha," He says in an oddly soothing voice as he stands up, I don't know who he is but I can tell there's an air of evil around him. "That Is I," I stand up to my full height taking my hand out of Michael's arm, "And you are?" I almost spit with disgust he looks like a peasant and he stinks. "Michael, Scarlett, This Is Father Rasputin," I hear Alice say but I don't take my eyes off the peasant in front of me, "What have you come for brother?" I see her out of the corner of my eye, "I have news for you my dearest sister," He leads her to sit down as the man walks closer to me and tries to kiss my hand but I bolt it away "Don't touch me," I snap at him as if he were a venomous bug, "Oh but little Natasha," He laughs at me, How dare he! "You silly woman you shouldn't disrespect me or else it'll be the death of your son," He smiles a sickly sweet smile, My hand flies up to my chest, My Son? My precious little George that I cannot protect anymore? I flare my nostrils angrily, "You have no business speaking to me of such things, Excuse me," I snap at him and walk out the door angrily, I slump against the wall and shut my eyes pondering his words, He is a peasant that is probably illiterate, But the tone of his voice still leaves a pit in my stomach-My eyes fly open as I feel something knock into my legs "What on-" I look down and see Alice's daughter Victoria looking up at me with teary eyes, She looks like her father I observe silently. "I'm sorry aunt Scarlett," She sniffles as I crouch down to her level, "Why are you crying?" I ask softly, I know how much my Duckie would hate to see her cry, He loved playing with her and Nicholas. I can feel the hot tears in my eyes but I push them back, "I miss mama and Georgie," She sniffles as I kiss away her tears on her cheeks, I don't have a handkerchief on me so it's all I can manage at the moment, "Your mama is right inside," I try to hide the acid in my voice, That My little boy cannot be reassured with this halfway across the world. "She is busy," She sniffles again and I look at her pitifully, Surely Alice wouldn't Neglect George's child? "Here, Why don't we go find your brothers and play a game?" I smile and stand up putting her on my hip, I can't help it. There's something about this child that makes me want to care for her, Maybe it was because Duckie loves her like his sister. "Thank you Auntie," She sniffles as she holds onto my neck and we walk into the nursery "Victoria! You were supposed to stay right here!" A governess scolds her as I put her down, "I wanted to find mama," She sniffles still holding onto my leg, I refuse to believe Alice would do this especially after she saw how George loved this child. I no longer feel grief when I think about him but relief that he's in heaven and I have my Misha now. "Come play Auntie," Victoria jerks me back to my thoughts as she leads to me to a small rocking chair with a few little dolls sitting around it. I catch a glimpse of two little boys sitting around a table in the other room but turn my attention back to Victoria, "You be this one," She hands me a blonde haired doll Reminiscent of herself, "That one is Irina, She is the mama," She smiles as I look at her sadly and decide she'll be welcome in my home at anytime.

The days go by in a flurry of activity as we prepare for our wedding. The Dowager Empress has refused to come because of my reputation, My poor darling was crushed by it, I know that he's been her favorite ever since George died. I stare at myself in the mirror, Wearing baby's breath in my hair with my veil and the small golden cross that once belonged to my mother around my throat. I look beautiful, Like a cream colored goddess. I'd never dreamed I'd ever be free of Boris much less be Marrying Michael. I almost laugh at my stupidity back then, How could I have been so blind to see how wonderful he is? His kind soul, His gentle and loving ness towards. I smile at the though of Marrying him as I turn around toward the door, "Are you ready?" I see Nicholas smile at me softly, He still supports his brother even if his mother doesn't. "You think I couldn't be?" I joke and take his arm as we start to walk down the hall towards the small chapel, Not many people will be there, Not many people are in favor of us anyways. "He's loved you a long time you know," I hear Nicholas say softly and I hide my surprise that he even spoke, "And now every inch of me is his," I say reassuringly and pat his arm, Everyday of the past year I've been falling in love with him, "Just, Don't hurt him." He says and I look at him shocked, Is that what he truly thinks of me? That I would ever hurt the people I love deliberately? I still have the look of shock on my face as the heavy chapel doors open. I can feel all the eyes on me as I walk down the aisle pondering Nicholas's words, I would never hurt him. Ever. I lift my chin up and smile at Misha and I can see he has tears in his eyes as I join hands with him at the alter. "Don't cry, It's real." I whisper and kiss his hand discreetly as the priest starts the ceremony.

That night I lay in bed as he kisses down my spine, "I'm so glad you're my wife," He mutters into my skin as I take his hand gently "And you are the best husband I could have asked for," I roll over onto my back and smile as his kind eyes look down into my very soul, He makes all my worries melt away. "Our children will be so beautiful," He smiles down at me as my heart stops and I feel clammy, He expects children from me, Of course he does. And I can't give him what he wants. I slowly get up and put my robe on and sit in front of the fire, "What's the matter?" He comes and sits next to me putting his arm around me "Adopting children is such a good thing to do yes," I bite my nails staring down at the fire, I hate that I can't give him an heir because of that damn train, "Can you not have children Tasha?" He looks down at me and I feel like a child, "It was because of the wreck," I shiver thinking about it and he pulls me closer to his warm body, "We already have two wonderful children," He mutters into my lips laying me down again, "I love you," I whisper 'me too" he mutters