Chapter 66: Alice

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St Petersburg 1913
I get back from the Alexander palace. It has been quite a long day as I was with Alix the whole day. Father Grigori is in town I hope to see him very soon. Nicholas is 18 now, my little boy has grown into a man. Time passes by so quickly it's already 1913! He looks so much like his father. Father Grigori told me that George's spirit lives through Nicholas. I am not surprised since he is the most obedient and well behaved son. I should send Victoria to father Grigori's church with a basket full of goods. I am sure he is tired from his journey.

I can not believe that Victoria is 14 as well, so many changes. My children are all growing up so quickly. I am glad that they were taught independence and manners as they are going to start appearing in court and at balls. I go to the tea room until I hear my telephone ring. "For you your grace" Mister Edgar says. I take the phone and answer, "Hello?" I say. "Alicy!" I hear Sunny's voice. "Yes Sunny?" I say. "Where did you go? We are going to have a gathering in the garden." She explains.

"Darling, I have to stay with the children" I tell her. "Bring them, I am sure my girlies would be excited to spend some time with their cousins" she says. I think about her offer, "alright I will be there in a few minutes" I tell her. "Good" she hangs up the phone. "Call the children please" I request to Edgar. He bows and soon I hear footsteps. I look up to see Nicholas, Alexander, Madeline, and Peter. "Where is Victoria?" I ask out loud but targeted towards my Nickie.

"She is at Uncle Misha's" Nickie answers. I smile at my eldest son, "thank you darling". I see Alexander scoff. He is has been out of control recently, going out all the time and I do not like it. I also do not like the amount of time Victoria spends At Scarlett's house. She should be dedicating her time to much more useful things such as going to church or doing her school work.

"We are going to see your cousins" I tell them. "I'm sorry mama but I can't go, George is arriving from England today" my Nickie explains. "My darling but are you well enough to go there for the whole evening?" I ask him. My poor Nickie has been feeling pains in his joints and I don't wish him to overtire himself. "I will be fine mana do not worry about me" he kisses the top of my head before leaving. He is such a good son, his father would have been so proud of him.

I stand up, "let's go" I walk ahead of the children and get into the carriage. The rest join me as Madeline sits next to me while Peter and Alexander sit across from us. We get at the Alexander palace and the servants lead us to the gardens as Alix is sitting on the deck as my beautiful nieces play in the gardens. "Sunny!" I sit next to her. She smiles at me, "Hello Alicy" I watch my children join my nieces. Alexander to Maria, Madeline to Tatiana and Olga while Peter lays down in the grass sunbathing, not minding anyone.

"Where is Victoria and Nicholas?" She asks me as she sips on her tea, she is Victoria's god mother after all I am not surprised with her concern. I take a sip of mine before answering her, "They are at Scarlett's her son is arriving today apparently. Victoria spends most of her time at Scarlett anyways" I explain to her. Alix tenses, "that is very dangerous Alice" she grits . "I know Alix" I say calmly as I know that alix has a strong dislike for Scarlett. "You don't know what she can be saying to your children, trying to raise Victoria" she says while watching our children.

"I assure you that I will get the situation under control" I tell her. Alix looks at me, "I hope you do, as I know you spend most of your time at the charities" she says. It is true. I stopped being Alexandra's lady in waiting and began to work with the poor, spending a lot of time with cousin Ella as she also spends a lot of her time helping the less fortunate, it's what god wants me to do. "I know you spend long hours there Alice, Ella told me" Alix continues. "I am just doing gods work" I drink my tea. "Well solve the issue with Scarlett and your daughter before I do" she warns me.

"I know Alix" I say as I watch the children play. "Good" she says as one of her lady in waiting's tell her that she is needed. "I will be right back" she tells me as I sit in place, watching the children. "Auntie Alice!" I hear Olga's sweet voice say as I turn my head to find her behind me and then sitting in Alix's empty chair. "Hello my darling, how have you been?" I ask her as I sip on my tea. Over the years Olga has grown close to me and when I stopped being a lady in waiting our bond grew stronger as she visits me every week for tea.

Olya sighs as she looks off into the distance, "You won't tell anyone what I will say right?" She asks me. "Of course this stays between us" I promise her. "I feel as if Mama has been putting a lot of pressure on me since she is too ill to attend public gatherings and I have to step in and then she wants me to control Alexei when it's very difficult since he refuses to listen!" Olga expresses. She looks at me, "Auntie I just feel sometimes as if Mama expects more then I can do".

I sit closer to her, wiping the falling tears from her face, "My darling you do the best you can. Do not fret about your mama. She can not expect perfection as no one was made perfect. Think about how odd the world would be with perfection? What effort you put and you do is enough and it will always be enough. Sometimes your mama will say something sharp because all of the pressure put on her and worrying about your brother, do not mind those words my dearest as your mama too is processing human emotions. So my love do not cry, it breaks my heart" I kiss her forehead.

I let go of her hand that I was holding and I sit back fully in my seat again. Olga stands up and embraces me, "Thank you Auntie I love you very much" she whispers into my ear before running off to join the others. Alexandra comes back and sits down next to me, "You know I've noticed that my Mashka and your Alex are quite smitten" she starts the conversation again as we continue to chat while drinking tea.

We get home late as we stayed for dinner. I stay up as Nickie telegramed that they will be home by 10:30. I sit in the tea room, reading as I hear shuffling out in the hall. "You both are back" I state as Victoria nods her head while keeping her head down before wishing me good night. My darling looks at me, "We had a lot of fun mama, it's been so long since I have last seen George, but he is still the same old best friend" he chuckles. I smile, I am glad that my darling is happy. "I am glad that you had fun, now it's late you must be tired" I say.

"Good night mama" he kisses my cheek as he hugs me. I hug him back before Nickie pulls away and walks to his room. I walk to my room and shut the door behind me. I change to my nightwear and sit down to pray, to pray for my baby girl and the love of my life. I also pray for Victoria. George has sent letters to her over the years but I never gave them to her. She shouldn't be focusing on some silly boy she should be focusing on helping the poor and charity work. What she never knew wouldn't hurt her. A few months ago George wrote again asking for Victoria's hand in marriage. He even sent a ring. Victoria was only 13 and now she is 14 she is too young, even if he wanted to wait.

Her life should do nothing with him. I won't allow it. I never replied to his letter I simply kept it. The letter now sits in my office at the bottom drawer. Her mind shouldn't be poisoned with such foolishness. I get lost in pray not noticing that an hour passes by. I finish my praying and get into bed, falling asleep after the long day.

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