The Sisters Of The Court

Chapter 40: Alice

I sat crying in George's arms. My mother was gone. I did not even get to say goodbye, she didn't even get to meet her grandchildren. It's all my fault, I'm a horrible daughter. I was lost in thought while sobbing in Georges arms. He stroked my hair in comfort, letting me cry. He was the best husband a woman could ask her, I did not deserve him. I felt George pull me close to him. "What else did the letter say my love?" I heard him say.

I try to calm down, as I take deep breathes. "I- I don't know" I try to say calmly. "I couldn't finish reading it"
George takes my chin and gently makes me face him. "Well my darling, I am sure that you will have to attend the funeral, I know your family will want you to be there." George wipes my tears away. "But I don't want to leave you all by yourself! I don't want to leave the children either!" I tell him as I hold onto him tightly.

"I'll be fine, the children will be safe with me back home. I want you to go, your family needs you. I couldn't attend my father's funeral, and I hate that I couldn't. I know that you would be full of regret for not going." George says. I hug him tightly, "I will have to be gone for at least a month" I say with tears, I can't be without you for that long!" I tell him.

"My darling your family will be there, you might be able to get closure about your mother." George says softly. "I wish that you could come with me, I wish that I could stay and be with you" I look into his eyes. He kisses me, "I know that you must go, although I will miss you every second that we are apart, you will be gone only for one month, and I will think of you every second that we are not in each other's arms." He says adoringly.

I love him so much, he is my everything. I am so lucky to have a husband like him. He is my everything, I will always only love him. "I miss you so very much my love. I will be thinking of you and the children constantly when I will be away, I love you so much" I kiss him. He smiles at me as he moves some of my loose hairs away from my face, "I love you so much my love" he kisses me.

"I will come back as quickly as I can my darling, I won't stay there any longer then I have to." I hug him. "You can stay as long as you need to my love I know that you had a difficult relationship with your mama" he kisses the top of my head. I sigh, "I should read the letter fully" I say out loud. I pull away from George and walk over to the desk, I open the drawer and take out the letter and officially read it.

"Our dearest stern,
As you can tell from the look of this letter it's not good news or a reply to one of your lovely letters but we sadly inform you with Our deepest apologies but your mama has past away a few days ago. I know that you haven't always gotten along with her but we- I beg you to come for her funeral it will be on the 18th. I know that there is some bitterness that you felt towards her but she wanted to tell you something before she died and never got to. Now it's my job to tell you. My dearest Alice, we miss you very much, please come back home to us, even if it's for a day.
~ your papa"

Fresh tears fall as I finish reading the letter, my poor papa wrote it personally to me. My poor papa, left all alone without anyone by his side anymore, he needed me. But what did mama want to tell me before she died? It couldn't have been that important since she had all of this time to tell me. I sigh in sadness, "The funeral will be on the 18th" I say out loud. "So it will take you one week to travel there and you will spend two weeks with your family and another week to travel back to Russia?" George asks.

"I guess so" I go back into his embrace. I rest my head against his chest, "Will you be fine with taking care of Nicholas? You remember everything that you have to watch out for? What he can and can't do?" I start to interrogate. "My love he will be fine, the governesses knows everything and I will make sure that nothing happens to him" he comforts.

"Good, I can't stand to imagine anything bad happening while I'm gone" I tell him worriedly. "You don't have to imagine because nothing bad will happen" George says comfortingly. "The children and I will be right at home awaiting your return"

I smile, "You always know what to say. Are you feeling better? I know that your health hasn't been the best and I don't want to leave you alone!" My smile disappears. George takes my hands into his, "My love I will be fine, you just go visit your family and not worry about us"

"Thank you George" I say as he takes out a handkerchief and coughs into it, quickly putting it away. He looks at me weakly, "You should get some rest, I'll go write my reply letter to my papa" I kiss his forehead as I pull away from him and let him lay down into the bed. George shuts his eyes and quickly drifts off as I sit down at the desk and pull out a piece of paper and a pen.

I take a deep breath, a trip back to the past that I will have to take.