Still ; George Weasley

One-hundred and thirty-seven

George

Leaving Allie was hard.

She hated it and at the same time, I hated the way she looked at me. Like I was the enemy. Like I had betrayed her or something.

She doesn't understand it right now, but eventually she will and hopefully she'll be thankful.

She's been drunk way more times than what she's told me. Drinking every single time she's on her own somewhere., drinking to drown her emotions.

She's not an alcoholic but that's where she was headed if I didn't get her to rehab.

It breaks my heart to see her like this, but I know I'm doing the right thing.

If she wasn't addicted, she wouldn't have broke down crying like that when being confronted and being exposed to something that can help her.

If she wasn't addicted, she wouldn't have tried and hide the fact that she always drinks when she's alone at her office.

Drinking at occasions is normal... drinking at a party or drinking at a bar — that's normal, but finding any excuse to drink, drinking alone and hiding while drinking... that's what reveals whether or not a person has a problem.

When I got home, I closed the door behind me. Fred was making tea but turned to look at me.

"Is she okay?"

I shrugged.

"No."

I walked over and pulled out a chair to sit at the table. I ran a hand over my face before I looked at my brother as he started pouring me some tea as well.

"She has to start of with seven days medically assisted withdrawal detoxification." I said. "She has been drinking again after I told her about rehab, and I don't know how or where she managed to do that seeing as I was home with her, but they made her blow into this weird thing that revealed that she had been drinking less than two hours earlier."

I sighed as I looked down at the table, dragging my finger around in circles.

"We can't visit her in those seven days." I said. "Not that she wants anyone to visit her. She's embarrassed."

"Embarrassed?" Fred asked. "The way I see it, it's not a shame to be addicted... but it's a shame to not do anything about it."

I hummed in response.

"After the seven days she has to follow a treatment model in twelve steps." I explained. "Then there're support groups which also follows twelve steps. Intensive treatment... group therapy again, family therapy, couples therapy as well."

"Couples therapy?"

"Yeah." I shrugged. "It's so that I know how to support her and help her in the future so that she doesn't relapse."

Fred nodded.

"Then she has to be tested in therapy types like Cognitive behavioural therapy, mindfulness and yoga for the sake of relaxation." I said. "And when she's finished with all of that, she gets free aftercare for a year meaning that she gets a person that can help make sure she stays away from alcohol."

Fred walked over with the two cups of tea and placed one in front of me, then took a seat across from me.

"But hey—" I let out a small chuckle. "...it would only be harder for her if the addiction had gotten worse."

"She's strong." Fred told me. "She'll be okay."

"Yeah." I breathed and looked down at my wedding ring, twisting it around on my finger. "I should've done something earlier... "

"Done what exactly?" He asked. "Forced her to stop? Take away the thing she finds comfort in?"

"Isn't that what I'm doing now?" I asked. "Fred... the way I talked to her. I told her I was going to divorce her if she kept drinking."

Fred sighed and leaned back in his chair.

"You gave her an ultimatum. What's so wrong with that?"

"No, it's the way I said it." I said in annoyance. "Gosh, the look on her face when I said it. She was already out of her mind, panicked because of the rehab thing and I only made it worse by threatening to leave her."

I picked up the cup and took a sip of the tea.

"It's not your fault that this happened." Fred told me. "She's been through so many things. From losing one of her best friends, to getting raped and almost killed... not to mention that she also almost lost her brother and then she had to live with having killed someone... even if it was just Cameron."

I looked at him.

"Allie came to terms with killing him." I said. "She's not—"

She lied about that too, didn't she?

"She's depressed, George." He said. "I know you see it too."

I closed my eyes.

"It can look like she's happy to others while really, she might feel like she's dying on the inside."

"She's stubborn." I mumbled, looking at him again as I cleared my throat. "She would never admit to how she's feeling."

I love Allie but I hate how stubborn she is. I thought she was doing better, but now it seems like she was just trying to hide it.

Maybe she won't be able to properly heal until the war is over.

Gosh I hope that's soon.

"I thought Chloe would help." I said and looked over at where she laid, sleeping on the sofa.

"You can't count on a dog to fix all of her problems." Fred said with a small chuckle. "She can offer support and she knows when to get someone but Allie still needs loads of therapy and she always has to want the help."

"She wants it." I nodded. "She just doesn't know how to accept it."

I took another sip of the tea.

"I remember how confident she was when we first started dating." I said. "I want her to feel like that again."

"She will." Fred nodded. "Someday."

I downed the rest of the tea before putting the cup down again.

"Well shit..." Fred laughed. "Go sleep, dear brother. Allie is safe... she's with professionals who knows what to do. She'll be okay."

I hummed.

"Yeah... I'm pretty tired." I muttered and stood up. I grabbed the cup and walked over to place it in the sink. "Night."

"Goodnight." Fred replied as I walked into the bedroom and closed the door behind me.

My eyes landed on the unmade bed... Allie's side being the messiest as she was the last one to wake up. I remembered the conversation we had, the way she cried and begged me not to put her in rehab.

I can't handle seeing her cry, and knowing that I caused her to do just that, hurts more than getting your ear blown off and I'm talking of experience.

I sat down on her side of the bed, grabbing her pillow. I brought it up and hugged it, closing my eyes as I took in her scent.

Oh Allie.