Ours To Be (All Ours, #1)

Chapter 55

Healing these past few weeks felt like I was a one-year-old learning to walk all over again.

I was certainly treated like one.

I don't think I have had a minute to myself since I left the hospital.

First, Richen decided to move in with me. He's been taking his chore as my personal nurse very seriously, being the medical student he is. And I've let him because it's been a long time since I saw my brother as torn as he was when he walked into my hospital room and saw me lying there, all bruised and thumped up.

The look on his face was the same broken one he'd give me every time he came home from football practice and saw a new bruise forming over my cheek. Or the same helpless one he'd give me when he so badly wanted to intervene and help me out in heavy arguments but knew he couldn't get in the middle of it. Only this time it was so much worse. He's a strong boy. I made sure that we both are. But when he brought me home and I noticed all of his stuff lined up in my guestroom, I couldn't find that strength in me to argue with him. I understood that he wanted to keep an eye on me since I could barely do anything without getting the urge to faint. I know I sure as fuck wouldn't have left him on his own if he'd gotten into an accident. So I just went with it.

Then there's the girls. They've also been here all day, every day, even going as far as to take turns to come in and help me shower because they know I didn't want an outsider or nurse in my home that I don't personally know, especially with me being naked. It just didn't feel right.

Nara cooks a lot, not letting me eat any junk or consume any alcohol because she knows I'm a stress eater. I would've gained about fifty pounds if my friends weren't there to keep me on track. I know they're just trying to keep me somewhat busy so that I don't get the time to dwell on what'd happened and let depression pull me into its infernal arms.

My grandparents have been here a lot as well. They were also really shaken up with what'd happened and even went down to the station and got involved with the case, promising to make anyone that had anything to do with this rot away in prison for the rest of their pathetic lives. I don't think I've ever seen them as angry and sad as they were when they came to visit. My grandmother is not a crier. In all those years I've poured my heart out to her about her son, not once has she shed a tear on either of our behalf's. She thinks they're futile. So do I. But I guess there's something different in the thought that you could have actually lost a loved one for good, and that possibility just hits a little sharper. Especially knowing what a close call my survival had been. I'd made it out by a thread, lucky enough that the route I was taking was sort of hectic, so somebody had called an ambulance within seconds of my crash. But I know that if anyone had been in the passenger's seat with me, they wouldn't have made it out of the car alive.

Joshua came and went a lot too. I think he was the hardest for me to get rejuvenated with. I hate holding grudges. It makes me miserable and bitter, but I can't help that a part of me still thinks it wouldn't have gotten this far if he just didn't listen to his best friend for once and just came to me. But Joshua is loyal to the core. It's one of my favorite things about him and what he's known for in our group, so it's not like I'd expect anything else from him, but still, what they did was so wrong. I could barely look at him, so he'd just come in and sit with me wordlessly. He'd bring me my favorite foods, sneak in wine when Nara left for the night, put on a movie we'd watched as kids, and check on my sore limbs like the fitness coach he is before he'd plant a kiss onto my forehead and left. Just like that.

It's not the way we used to be, not by a fucking longshot, but he knows forgiveness doesn't come easily with me. Not while I was still stuck in bed, body practically rolled up in casts.