Black Rose

43.

Ryan

As the next few weeks went by things have been going great. Dave and I have been doing good with co parenting, and I currently had a lunch date with Antonio. Basically for us to rekindle things and see what's been going on in each other's lives over the last year and a half. I knew I had to be completely honest with him about the abortion, and I had no idea how he would react. I was almost to the location he sent to me and my nerves were getting the best of me. The kids were with Dave and they were gonna spend the weekend with him.

Once I made it I saw that I was at a park, my eyebrows furrowed in confusion. I got out and and looked around, I looked down at my phone and before I had the chance to look up a pair of hands covered my eyes. "Antonio? What are you doing?" I said with a chuckle. "A nigga tryna be romantic." he said laughing. "Close your eyes and ima lead you to the destination." he said removing his hands from my eyes. I kept my eyes closed and he grabbed my hands leading me to wherever he had things set up. Once we came to a stop, he told me to open my eyes and he had this picnic set up. There was a blanket spread out on the ground and there was a picnic basket with a bottle of wine in ice. "Oh my God." I said in awe, I turned and damn near jumped into his arms. He held me up and wrapped his arms around me, he met me halfway for a kiss. His appearance changed a lot over the months, he quit popping pills and drinking lean, he got into the gym so he looked healthier with a good amount of weight on him. He sat me down and I hugged him, "thank you for this." I said honestly excited. We sat on the blanket and started catching on the missed time, we were having a great time but I knew I had to tell him. "So there's something I need to tell you, and I'm not sure how you might react to it.." I said taking a sip of wine to calm my nerves. "Okay.." he said giving me his undivided attention. "So whenever we cut ties with each other I um.. found out I was pregnant. I ended up having an abortion, I know it was wrong and I wanted to tell you but I wasn't sure how you would react." I paused and looked at him for some type of expression. He cleared his throat and went to speak, "Ryan I'm gonna be 100% honest with you, I kinda already knew. And for you to confirm something I already had suspicions about, I can't say that I'm upset about it. I dealt with my emotions at the time the situation was brought to my attention, I was mad for awhile cause I didn't expect that from you but I also tried to look at it from your perspective. Those feelings resurfaced when you announced your pregnancy last year, I felt like "damn how does she have his baby again but get rid of mines?" and honestly I expected myself to get out of character when we did have this conversation but I'm at peace with the way things turned out cause regardless of how I feel it's your body. And I can't tell you what to do or how to do anything, you're a grown adult. But what I will say is there's no hard feelings and I'm okay." he finished off. And I was honestly shocked that he reacted so calmly, in a situation like this he was the complete opposite of Dave. "I'm sorry.." I said feeling guilty all over again. He leaned over and pulled me into a hug, which caused me to basically end up laying on him. "Everything's cool mama." he said planting a kiss on my forehead. We spent the rest of our evening eating, laughing, talking, drinking, etc. I really enjoyed myself and I was glad that he was understanding of the situation we brought our date to this rooftop movie. We took pictures for memories and it made me feel like I was a teenager all over again.