She's like a mirror

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(Sebastian's P.O.V.)
One of the nurses had put in a nose tube to help Phoenix breath cause her left lung had taken a blow. The nurse said it wouldnt be painfull but it is uncomfortable when putting it in. Phoenix made annoying and angry noises and kicked her legs to get away from the nurse her hand with the tube. I could tell she was not a fan of the nose tube but thankfully she didnt cry. As soon as the tube was placed Phoenix stopped kicking and huffed annoyed while giving the nurse a glare. I thought the nurses where done with checking up on Phoenix cause she told me that she had to spend some night in hospital but I was wrong. Because they needed to put an IV in aswell so they could adminster the medication. This broke my heart cause there were loud painfull screams and rapidly falling tears from Phoenix. The nurse who was trying to get the IV in had failed the first and second time to succesfully and painless get it in. "Just put it in. You're hurting her" I cried out at the nurse in anger. "Im sorry. This is my first try on a person" she said ashamed. "What?" I asked her in shock as I held Phoenix trembling hand. "Its my first day as a resident" she said with a shaky breath as tears started to form into her eyes. You've got to be shitting me. How dare she cries while my child is the one in pain. I looked at her as she grabbed another needle. "No" I said and stepped in front of her, "you're going to get someone who has done this before" I told at her venom was spitting from my tongue. She stayed still not doing anything and it annoyed me to no end.

 She stayed still not doing anything and it annoyed me to no end

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"Well?!" I huffed at her in annoyence. She quickly nodded and went to find someone else. I climbed on the stretcher and pulled my baby in my lap and rubbed circles on her back and hummed her favorite song. Her hand grabbed onto my shirt, I carefully wrapped my big hand around hers so I wouldnt hurt her. This was her hand where the fucking idiot messed up putting the IV in. It already started to bruise slightly. "Im so sorry, Mr Stan" the head nurse said as she walked in. I just gave her a death glare "who in their right mind thinks its a good idea to have someone put their first person's IV in on an already scared child" I growled at her. She nodded before grabbing a chair and sat down on it. Phoenix softly cried as she buried her face in my chest. Thankfully for the hospital's sake the head nurse placed the IV with ease in Phoenix right hand. If she didnt I would've probably broken a wall... or three. "You can follow me" the nurse had told me after putting down the bandage wrapping to hold the IV in place. I lifted Phoenix up so she would have a much more comfortable position. Her head leaned on my shoulder and she wrapped her arms around my neck. I followed the nurse to the room we got assigned too. "Tata, I want Bucky Bear" I heard Phoenix softly cry into my ear. "I know, doll. I know" I said and patted her back after she grabbed my neck tighter. The head nurse, named Ina I later learned, opened the door for us. As I walked over to the hospital bed, nurse Ina opened the curtains. Well, atleast we have a good view. I carefully put Phoenix down on the bed and walked to the hooks on the door to hang mine and Phoenix's jackets on.

My fingers carefully traced through Phoenix's hair while she was looking at the tv tiredless. I was sitting on a chair next to her bed and my upperbody was leaning on the matras and my head was laying on my left arm. I looked up to her fragile face. It was pale and it was drained of colour. No rosey cheeks, no sun kissed skin. Just a sickly pale colour. I heard a soft knock on the door and turned to see Chris walking inside. He greeted me and sat down the bags that where filled with mine and Phoenix's clothes. He then walked to the other side of Phoenix's bed and she weakily followed his movements with her eyes. I could see a faint smile appear on her face as she saw one of her favorite people in the whole world. "I brought someone with me who misses you alot" Chris softly said to her and sat down on the other chair beside the bed. Phoenix watched him carefully as he pulled out Bucky Bear from behind him. Her face lit up with some colours as she held her arms out to him. He chuckled and handed her the bear. She instantly hugged him tightly to her chest. "Me and dad are going to get some coffee, we'll be right back okay" Chris told her and she nodded before sliding down under the covers.

(Chris's P.O.V.)

I closed the door behind us and walked towards the kitchen together with Seb. "Two coffees please" I told the person that was working the hospital kitchen. She nodded and got some stuff ready for our coffee. Sebastian sat down on a nearby couch and rubbed his hands through his hair in defeat. I retrieved the two cups of coffee and walked to my friend. I placed one of the coffee mugs on the table in front of him. He said something but I couldnt hear it. "Im sorry?". "I said that it should've been me!" He screamed standing up from the couch.

 "I said that it should've been me!" He screamed standing up from the couch

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"I should've been the one to.... to get hit by that fucking car! Not her. Not my baby" he said and tears started to form in his eyes. "I know. I would say that aswell" I told him.

(Sebastian's P.O.V.)
Silence filled the air around us and I put my head once again in my head in defeat. I felt the couch dip beside me. "You're going to be okay" I heard Chris softly tell me. "No" I said shaking my head, "no Im not going to be okay. Because she isnt okay. And it... it kills me that I cant hold her without the fear consuming me at the possibility of hurting her even more". I felt Chris put his hand onto my shoulder "then you need to show her you're okay, show her you're strong. Cause she is like a mirror with you. Every emotion you show she copies it. You dont give up, she wont" he explained. I nodded at him understanding where he is coming from. "But most of all. Keep a smile on your face and hers will follow".

Published: 5th of November 2021

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