Randomly Thereafter | SakuAtsu

• Arguments •

Tsumu and I have been into little, immature fights in the next six months.

We argue about work, spending time together, third party (which are all baseless), even washing the dishes. It's crazy if you ask me but a big deal to him.

We solve all these problems through the help of his mother, Megumi-san. She kept giving us advice, telling us that it's normal for newly weds to argue at some random things.

Samu even told us that we are being kinda childish as ever.

Samu is definitely mature than Tsumu with relationships, and handling it.

"What matters the most is you respect each other, love and never doubt your feelings and always give your absolute loyalty to one another." Megumi-san always lectured this that I can almost hear it everytime Tsumu and I fight about senseless things.

We usually apologize to each other... kiss and make-up as many people may say.

Atsumu and I are no longer kids, we're 27 but all I can see is us as little children bickering around the house for little stuff we have misunderstanding on.

I love Atsumu, and he loves me too, I know... But we just kept feeling insecure and everything else, making us more like kids fighting about a candy we can't both have.

I'm not getting tired or anything... It's just that, Tsumu and I grew apart for 8 years and it's like we have to get to know each other.

I asked him for marriage, not because I am in a hurry. I asked because I want to spend my life with him because I love him.

We don't argue everyday, but it's like we just met... getting to know who we are as adults... It's like meeting a new Atsumu.... and he meeting a new me.

I sometimes ask myself

Shouldn't I ask him all of a sudden?

Should I have taken it slower?

Should I just asked for a date back then when we met in the office before actually commiting ourselves in marriage?

Did we actually got married without considering these things?

Have we been overwhelmed by our feelings and we decided unlogically?

All my insecurities and childish thoughts makes me go crazy at times.

The day after our 1st wedding anniversary, we had a big fight.

It's not like any other arguments we had before.

"I'm ready to be a father, Tsumu." I said during dinner.

We just came home from our vacation for our wedding anniversary.

The look on his face is more than enough to tell his thoughts.

He looked at me frowning, almost pale.
"N... No...Not...yet..."

That night he left home, and stayed at Samu's place without explaining or listening to my thoughts.

He just left.