Dernière Danse [Jikook]

72❄️

Dust to Dust - The Civil Wars

*Slightly unedited*

It's silent.

No, not a sweet silent.

Nor a gentle one with the only sounds of breathing and the faint patters of rain to fill in the empty ambience. Maybe the rain did some justice to not make it feel so suffocating but that still didn't change anything.

Jimin still felt unbearably uncomfortable.

And it was because of that thick silence spreading the air between him and the man behind the wheel on the driver's side of the car. For a while now the car has been off, parked outside Jimin's apartment, yet no one made a move to get out or even say anything.

The words just didn't seem to be coming out.

Since they knew they needed to have this talk.

It came off as a surprise to Jimin that after practice at the studio that Taemin offered to drop him off home. The two haven't spoken since their last fight probably a week ago, and Taemin never came back home after that. Not going to lie, Jimin did say some fucked up shit to his face and Taemin clearly was not able to handle the impact of the vocal daggers Jimin threw to fragile soul.

So they haven't spoke for that long.

Until now.

And to say it's this silence is unbearable would be a pitiful understatement.

It's fatal.

Jimin for a moment did consider speaking up first but he didn't know what to say to him. He didn't know whether to apologize straight out like that, explain why he said what he said, or just say some bullshit excuse like how he used to do.

He didn't know.

And it seemed like he didn't have to since Taemin spoke up first.

"You know..... This right here, is so ironic," Taemin says quietly, his voice small yet weak with no doubt a fragile smile on his lips, "We went from talking about our days, being able to hold each other when we were in need, saying our 'I love you' with a smile and now.... Shit, you're sitting right next to me, and we can't even breathe the same air."

Jimin's jaw clenches to this, staring out the window to the blur of the world, lips tugging to a frown to how those words scarred a deep wound in his heart.

Knowing how true those words are.

"And now I see that you're close with Jeongguk again and I'm just-" Taemin pauses, clearly taking a deep intake of breaths to gather himself together, "I'm scared to lose you. I don't just mean as whatever it was that was going on between us, but as your instructor and your friend. I just don't fucking know how you see this. I want you to be honest with me and tell me what to do?"

The scar in Jimin's heart deepens and he grunts under his breath, "It's not your fault for the fight okay. I wasn't taking my medication and I had a relapse....... I'm sorry that..... I told you that you didn't mean anything to me. You do mean a lot to me."

"I know about the relapse," Jimin slowly turns his head to where Taemin's voice came from, just barely making out the frown on his lips with his focus on the wheel of the car, "Known you for a while now, not hard to tell these things apart."

Jimin sits up now, perplexed eyes trying to see him, "Then why didn't you come back?"

Taemin was silent for a moment, sniffling a little, "Because I was gaining feelings for you, and I wasn't being sincere about our friendship," He admits quietly, making Jimin's heart softly drop, "If I were to have stayed or came back, this would've just drowned us in a toxic spiral. So I did what I thought was best and distanced myself, just so I can be able to look at you and not think of how I want to be with you for the rest of my life."