SBI Oneshots (technodad +others)

storming a castle

A/N I forgot who asked for this but here ya go

"Do you surrender?"

"Never. I fall with my kingdom and my kingdom falls with me. If you must take my life then so be it." The piglin stared down at the king kneeling before him. A tyrannical ruler, probably not meaning any word of what he's saying. A man that deserves to fall from his throne.

"Alright." Techno shrugged and lifted the sword. A sudden quiet, hiccuping cry sounded through the empty room. The piglin glared at the king and stuck the sword into the wooden floor. He untied the strap around his chest and pulled it around. A baby sat in the strap crying. "Look what you did. You woke him up. How dare you." The king looked up with confusion while the piglin that had just stormed his castle bounced a young child in his arms. "What should we do with him Chat? He woke up Tommy."

KILL
BLOOD
BLOOD
BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD
BLOOD
BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD
dont let him mansplain manipulate us. if he didnt wanna be killed he shouldve been a malewife
^^TRUUUUU
^IDK WHAT THAT MEANS BUT YEAH!
KILL HIM
CALM TOMMY DOWN
NOOOOO THE POOR PIGLET
DOWN WITH THE KING
kinda rude m8. waking up a child while we kill you. how dare he, honestly
BLOOD

"Hey bubs, you're alright, it's alright, I'll get rid of the mean man." Technoblade grabbed the sword as placed it to the kings neck. The begs of the man silenced as blood sprayed across the floor. "Ah fuck, I liked these boots. Alright, we're done here. Let's go Toms." He let the sword fall to the floor and cradled his son with both arms. The kid slowly calmed down and started playing with the golden rings on his father's hands while Techno walked through the castle. He took anything he saw of value and walked out the castle gates.

Some citizens cheered for the downfall of the tyrannical king while some booed. Techno honestly didn't care what people thought, he did send glares towards the people that were being a little too loud for his liking. Chat cooed over the half-piglin baby as it slowly fell back to sleep. Techno smiled softly and tied the strap so the kid was leaning on his chest. He made his way to the local inn and dropped a small pouch of gold onto the desk. The worker gave him a key, without any conversation thank prime, and pointed him towards the room.

Technoblade's movements grew sluggish after he shut the door. He untied the sling and carefully laid Tommy down on the bed. Chat seemed to quiet down as well, satisfied with the bloodshed and the mostly calm Tommy. He took off the boots and scowled at the ex-kings blood. That was going to be annoying to clean when he gets home. Maybe he'd make Wilbur do it in exchange for helping him babysit Jebediah's kid. Tuberculosis? Tobias? Whatever the kids name is. He shrugged off his cape and finally allowed himself to lay down.

"Relax Chat, I'll write to dadza in the morning." He yawned and pulled Tommy to his chest. The piglet was small compared to him, a normal size compared to other piglets his age but Techno couldn't help but smile at the fact he'd be able to keep his son that close to him for at least three or four more years before Tommy grows out of it. He enjoyed keeping his son close to him and he understood why Phil was always so clingy to him and Wilbur when they were small. It was almost like a sense to protect the young but also reassurance for himself.

The next morning he woke up to small hands on his face. A childish giggle made him open his eyes and look at the little troublemaker. The bright blue eyes looked back at him before falling into another giggle. Techno smiled and sat up making the kid fall into his lap. Slowly Chat woke up and filtered through his brain. Some complained about being woken up while others yelled about breakfast. He nodded and put the kid on his shoulder. He moved to the small kitchen area and looked through the bag he threw onto the table the night before.

"Food?" He looked at the child and motioned to the food in the bag.

"'Tato!" Techno laughed and nodded. The child played with his hair while he pulled out potatoes and a few other foods and started cooking. Once he finished he mashed the potatoes and carrots and cut the chicken into small bites and put it in a bowl for Tommy before serving his own plate.

"Go back home today." Tommy smiled and clapped. "Have to write to Winged One before leaving."

"Bird!" Chat cheered for the crow that wasn't even there yet and started yelling for them to hurry. Techno rolled his eyes and went back to making sure Tommy didn't get his clothes too dirty. Sure he would have to change the kid before they leave anyway but he isn't really fond of carrying around food dirtied clothes. "Blade." He hummed and looked at the kid. "Done." He looked at the empty bowl and smiled. Techno wiped the kids face and set him on the table while he finished. "Miss Storyteller."

"Get to see Storyteller tonight." Tommy smiled and looked around the room. He gasped and made grabby hands towards the window.

"Bird!" Techno looked at the window and nodded to the crow. He made his way and let it in before grabbing a paper and hastily writing a letter. He quickly folded it and wrapped a ribbon around it before handing it to the small crow along with a small piece of gold. Tommy cheered as the bird quickly flew around the room and back out the open window. Techno chuckled and walked back to the kid. He picked Tommy up and tossed him in the air once. The little piglin squeeled with laughter and grabbed onto his dads sleeves.

Technoblade quickly washed the dishes and changed his sons clothes. Their bags were filled with the stolen items from the castle and soon the only thing showing that anyone was even in this room was the messed up bedset and the slight bloodied prints from his boots. Tommy sat on his shoulders looking around with him before getting distracted as his dad placed the crown in front of him. The kid smiled and held onto the golden headpiece ready to start chewing on it. Suddenly a shiny golden ornament was held up beside him. Techno chuckled as he felt his son grab the ornament from his hand.

The key was left on the desk as he left, not really wanting to talk to anyone. It seemed the town had calmed down since the night before. Techno made his way out of the town with his son on his back.