The Sound of Her Heartbeat

62. The Frustration

Jenny's pov:

Shaylin silently stood up, came to me and held my head in her chest carefully to avoid the wounds, I can feel her soft breast cusioning my face. She then whispered "I'll go get ready for work". But I don't feel like letting her go. She's wearing her usual indoor fit, tank and pj's and I'm still grabbing her waist, looking at her alluring figure! 

I suddenly realized between Shay being tired from handling work, classes and taking care of me while I'm doing nothing, we haven't had a single passionate moment lately. And that pent up frustration is getting to me. It's like I can't even control my actions right now as my fingers subtly moved up her tank, feeling up her waist, making me a bit thirsty..

"Babe..." There's a bit discomfort in Shay's voice, her hands are still on my shoulder but not resisting. I ignored her tone and kept feeling up her midriff with my thumbs underneath her shirt. Suddenly I lunged my face in her chest, wet-kissing in her cleavage!

"Ok.. Jen.. babe.." The hesitation is clear in her voice but I don't want to stop. If anything, it's making me want to be more aggressive. Before she could resist, I slowly slid my hand on her shoulder, clutching her tank-top, I want a taste of her breast... now! 

Shaylin's pov:   

I was pretty upset when Jen snapped at me just a second ago and now she's thirsting? "Babe, listen.." I'm trying to stop her but she's lost it, took down the straps of my tank and bra, uncovering my right breast! She immediately took it in her mouth and started to suck. 

She sucked on my breasts countless times before and I let her out of love, passion and affection. But this one feels like out of a sickened sexual frustration. "Jen.. stop.." I feel weird even saying it because I've mostly let her have at me before, but this time she's literally forcing herself on me! "Babe.. careful.." I closed my eyes, "your head still got bandages" pursing in my lips, trying gently to stop her but she's latched on, it doesn't feel.. right, it's stressing me out.. "JEN STOP!" I yelled, snatched her head off my breast! That did it. It took a second for her to understand what just happened. 

Jen's panting, her lips are shaking. I looked into her eyes, there's pure shock that's slowly turning into fear of relization of what she's done...

I quickly sorted out my clothes, stood there for a minute in silence. The living room is painfully quiet. This awkard silence is unsettling! I somewhat stuttered saying "I.. um (cleared throat).. get.. get ready.." then went to my room, leaving a speechless Jenny in the couch.

I covered my chests defensively right after closing the door. What the fuck was that! I feel like breaking down... I have to get myself together.
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I'm sitting with Adam in the office's cafeteria. Just finished with the meeting, but the whole time my mind has been a bit disturbed by what happened with Jenny earlier. 

The ever perceptive Adam picked up my stressed demeanor. "Everything okay?" He asked, his lively voice eased me a bit. I sighed and replied "Not really."

Adam: "What's wrong?"

Me: "What isn't?"

He smiled sympathetically, asking "Having a difficult time at home?" I took a second then told him the problems we're facing, minus what happened today. "Sounds like she needs something to be busy with." He said after hearing everything. 

I shrugged saying "Yeah, I mean, we got those charted therapy sessions together and..." He interrupted me and said "No no, I don't mean those." That got me confused.. and curious.

Me: "Then?"

Adam: "I mean like, something of her own, isn't she busy with home office?"

Me: "Um.. not really.."

Adam: "Why not? The biggest perk of our line of work IS to work from home, it'll keep her mind busy and any kind of treatment session will feel refreshing after... at least I think so."

Wait.. is that true? "Also" he continued "Since she's wanting to be with you all the time, why don't you bring her to the office?" That surprised me "Really?" I asked, clearly baffled.

Adam: "Yeah why not, Jen's using crutches right? Meeting up with us here might freshen up her mind, provide some entertainment of hanging out while staying close to you..."

It took a few minutes to process his words. Wait a damn minute... Adam's right! What the fuck have I been doing to Jen so far? All those time when she wanted to be with me, why couldn't I come up with this idea? Also, I've been requesting her not to work, thinking that I'm 'sheltering' her from stress, but in actuality I've kept her away from a healthy busy time... oh god, I feel sick!

No wonder Jen's so frustrated, she never said any of this to me probably because she didn't want me to stress out more, or maybe she hadn't noticed herself. All those times when I pushed her for therapy sessions, I could've encouraged her to work for half an hour, maybe she needed me to.

I explained my dilemma to Adam then couldn't hold my tears. "As if she hadn't been through enough.." I said quivering, holding my head "I've made it even worse." 

Adam's trying to comfort me, he didn't expect his advices to hit me like this. We've stayed like this for a while before I finally managed to calm down.

"Listen.." He said "One thing I do know that the love you two share, is beyond anyone's comprehension" I looked at him helplessly but his words are comforting. "I don't know what's going on, but whatever happened, happened.. you can help her from now on, right?"

I nodded quietly, then smiled at him saying "Thanks Adam.."

"Eh" He waved casually and said "what are friends for."

We shared a chuckle, I feel much lighter now. Then I brought out my phone, thinking about calling Jen, just to check on her, took a deep breath, then dialed. Jen isn't picking up, maybe she's in the bathroom? When I thought I'll end it, she received the call -

Jenny: "H..hey"

Me: "Hey.. um.. what're you doing?"

Jenny: "N.. nothing.. wai.. waiting for you.."

Her voice is oozing guilt. Oh boy I have to say something. Adam saved me yelling "Hey, tell her that the cafeteria got the kabab roll, she might like it" then chuckled. 

Me: "Oh right, hey um.. I'll bring some kabab rolls for us.. okay? You like them right?"

Jenny: ".... yeah...."

That long pause between answering kinda felt weird. Or maybe I'm just imagining things.

Me: "Ok um.. great.. I'll see you soon I guess."

She didn't say anything so I cut the call. Despite everything, I love her way too much and I'm feeling bad for how things became so chaotic between us so far. I need to be with her now, more than ever.