Storms of the Sky

muddy - LX

TW: mental health, breaking down, mentions of trauma, ab.se, assa.lt

--Briar--

 If I teach them the basic movements. Well, I did. And it worked. They're growing so much. Getting better and better. Soon they'll surpass me. Good. They deserve it.

"Thorn?" I look up, heat melting my face. Bastet smiles as they lean their head to the side. Their stars, them call them, glow brighter.

"Oh sorry," I murmur, looking down. They're so close right now. They came out just to talk. But somehow my mind mistook today with that day I taught them Moon. How long ago was that now?

"You know, Thorn, you're so spacey. But I think that's okay!" They grin with all their teeth.

I open my mouth. Nothing comes out. It's okay? Are they lying? They must be.

"Did you ever graduate from the Meadow?" Bastet asks. Their voice is smoother today. It was raspy the other day. Their eyes were so red.

"No," I respond, frowning. "I mostly learned from Hadron." I shoot my glance up. My eyes burn from being wide. Bastet just sits back on the tree branch we climbed.

"Hadron? Is he your brother or something?" I look down. Something's in my throat.

Flare...never told Bastet. He never told them about Hadron. Or his scar. Or me. Flare never told Bastet anything.

They never forgave him.

I can't tell Bastet now, with their smile and unchapped eyes. Will...they be so forgiving? Are they so forgiving?

"No...Hadron is more like a father to me, I guess. He took me in when I was small. Gave me jobs to do. That stuff." I focus down. Should I continue? Bastet stays quiet.

I don't like saying Hadron is my father. It feels like sweat on my arms and legs.

I dig my fingertips into the bark. It pinches my skin. My head feels muddy.

"He isn't my dad. I–I don't have a dad anymore. But I did. I did." My words spill out faster than I can talk. My fingers dig deeper. "Hadron gives me jobs like the job I have now. But I don't want to do the job now. That job is bad. But they're all bad. They're all bad. Ha."

I chuckle softly.

"He ripped my ear. He made me bleed. But he's nice when I do good. I have to do good. I—" I stop. Bastet has their hand on my leg.

I cover my mouth with my hand. I talked too much.

My head is muddy. Muddy muddy muddy.

Bastet's eyes are soft. They frown slightly. Eyes watery.

"I guess we both have problems," they say. I meet their gaze. Mouth opened slightly. Bastet focuses down as our eyes meet. Their nose squished and lips twisted. Their face is pink. They look sick.

What happened to them?