⟡I'm Sorry ♠⟡♠ Ashtray⟡

Confessions of a Teenage Runaway

     It felt like I had been there for ages, I didn't move from the spot in two days. Having finished the pocky box the first night I was there. At this point I was starving, dying of thirst, and tired. Not really the best place to get sleep. I woke up early due to the sun rising, sitting up. I rubbed my eyes, ignoring the pain in my stomach as I reached in my bag to check my phone. Only twelve percent left. I sighed, seeing that school would start in an hour. Should I go, or just skip again? I still don't wanna go home, especially if I skipped today too that would just fuel his anger. Not to mention I'm starving, and I get lunch for free at school. I sighed once more, pushing myself off of the ground. I kept my hood up, making my way for school, hoping not to pass anyone. Walking there, or in the halls. I know I'm not in the best condition, I'm sure my hair was gross, I'm sure my eyes showed I was tired, and well, I'm sure I don't exactly smell like roses at the moment either. I was still wearing the same clothes as the other day, so that only added to my embarrassment, but honestly I was so fricking hungry I almost, almost didn't care. 

     I'll just keep my hood on in class, teachers can go fuck themselves, I am so not walking into class like this. I stopped for a moment, scared about actually going to school in my current state. What if everyone's mad at me. What if Fez hates me now? It's probably better if he did anyways, the further apart we are the less trouble he'll run into. He's a drug dealer though, he deals with shit all the time, yeah well.. he don't need to be dealing with my shit.. My brothers such an asshole. I continued walking, head lowering the more I thought about Fez. He was so nice to me, more of a brother in the short amount of time I knew him than my brother had been my entire life. At this point I made it to school, already walking down the hall.

"Leslie!" I stopped suddenly, almost getting knocked over as someone behind me tried getting by. I looked up slightly, seeing Rue and them all standing there in a group against the wall. I looked back down, not sure what to do. Soon enough they all said screw it, making their way to me.

"Hey, where've you been, girl?"

"Girl, we thought you were fucking dead."

"Are you okay? We heard you ran off and-" They all over lapped each other, but it was all mostly the same thing. I kept looking down, yet again feeling bad cause I made them worry about me.

"I'm sorry." I cringed at this, not just because of how weak it sounded, but because last time I said I was sorry I got yelled at. I felt my eyes sting as Ash's voice echoes in my head again.

"Aw girl, come on. Let's go in here." It was Maddy, her lightly pushing me to the other side of the hall. I could tell the others were following, looking up seeing we were making way to the bathroom. We all huddled inside, the last person washing their hands from before leaving the room as we all entered.

"So you gonna tell us where you been the last few days?" I stayed quiet, eyes flickering up to some of them every so often. Rue came over and gave me a side hug.

"I'm glad you're okay, alive I mean." It was an awkward cover, but true none the less. I don't think the others knew about my attempted suicide, but Rue did. Rue and I seemed to get each other, almost like we think alike sometimes. We seem to read each other easily.

"I'm, I didn't mean to make you guys worry." It sounded better then my first attempt.

"You gonna tell us where you were now?" Maddy, she sounded kind of pissed. More pissed than I expected.

"I was.. uh.. I was holding up in some alley." This is definitely the second most awkward moment in my life.

"Oh my God, girl."