Koi No Yokan

Vacation at Jeju

Minju's POV:

We are now on our way to Incheon Airport, where we will be riding a plane to get to Jeju. It was a whirlwind to get here, we had to run because Mong told me we are going to be late, if I know, she was avoiding Eunbi Unnie and Yujin. Yujin was a nice girl, she always smiled through any difficulty she was facing. A strong willed woman like Haneul Appa, she reminds me of Haneul Appa with her fun and bubbly demeanor in life. Yujin knew about Mong and I pretending to be girlfriends in front of Eunbi Unnie for Hyewon to get a shot with Eunbi Unnie. I told her right off the bat about it, because in my mind, she deserved to understand me and Mong Oppa while we face Eunbi Unnie. Plus there was no sense trying to hide it from Yujin, I love Yujin and have felt affinitive with her and she is someone who I see myself with in the future. She loves me so much too and I wanted our relationship to be based on honesty and true feelings, it wasn't necessary for me to lie and I expect her not to lie to me too. We are still in our testing phase if you can call it that. No commitments yet as of right now, I'm not yet ready for a real relationship and that was a deal with her and we openly discussed this.

Mong was silent as we sped past some cars going to Incheon. It was a comfortable silence between us. I needed the vacation and I would be forever grateful for her for taking me to Jeju, somewhere far from the hustle and buzz of Mapo-gu. Far from Central Seoul to think about my future with the team. I wasn't entirely sure up to when will I be able to hold out for my spot. Chaen added some pressure to the mix because she was being a dictator as it seems she changed to a new person who doesn't care for her team. She speaks harshly to me and Mong Oppa, she calls us both untalented whenever one of us don't get to dance exactly the way she wanted us to dance, this past week's evaluation alone, she scolded me and Mong Oppa. I had to put on a brave face and actually stand up to her. Countless times, we've had screaming matches, countless times since the third anniversary of both parents' dying and leaving us.

I shout and scream back at her whenever she was being unreasonable and for weeks, I've been very patient and understanding of her. I refused to give up on her, practicing countless of times, harder than anyone else in the team. I wanted to debut with her and I wanted to be someone worthy of her and her team. She's actually right, I was talentless, I knew how to play instruments and I knew how to sing, that's about it for me. I can never for the life of me dance like she wanted me to dance. I didn't quite understand why Sejeong Unnie hasn't removed me yet. In fact earlier after our performance, I was even commended by Sejeong Unnie, she said that she saw in me my passion in dancing, but to Chaeyeon, I was always the talentless burden to her and her debuting team, so much so that she goes vocal now about it. I had to put up with her and practice double the time, often over time. She is family after all and when you are family, no one gets left behind. I dance breathless and sing breathless day in, day out for her to recognize my improvements.

People may think I should quit training to become an Idol Star. My Mom and Dad thought so too, but I was unstoppable. I refuse to surrender to Chaen's erratic behavior, I believe she was just pressured as much as she pressures us to dance according to her specifications, this is her final bid to debuting. So as much as I wanted to give up, I can't. I will continue to work hard for her. I will continue to show her love, compassion and understanding. I was brought out of my reverie when I felt my hand being held by Mong Oppa. I looked back to her and a smile was plastered to her face.

"You're doing great until this time, don't stress so much about Chaeyeon. I understand her, if I was in her shoes, given this was her last chance to debut and if she doesn't she needed to go back to school and become a doctor and assume her family"s business, I too will feel the stress and need to debut. Let's try to understand her and I promise you, I will be there for you to comfort you on worst days, to celebrate with you on days there is something to celebrate. We are in this together, I am same as you." She told me after a few moments of staring down each other.