Let the Heart Do the Talkin': (An Aerosmith/Kiss Love Story)

Chapter 3-All I Know (Joe Perry)

Dreams are such powerful things, a glimpse of things to come, how they could be...As a matter of fact I am dreaming now...and it's been SO long....

The scene before me is hard to describe, all I know is I feel...I FEEL so many emotions, happiness, pride, just pure joy, and love such as I've never known before...Tommy...Tommy Thayer, lays in bed before me, pregnant it seems and is glowing, I gently place my hands on his stomach and feel the baby move and kick...getting choked up.

"Tommy...God, I just I mean I can't believe it.... here you are carrying our second child." I pause a moment, thinking of the fact our first as I see it, is our son Evan... seeing as I've adopted him. "Our little girl."

"Evan is so happy...I am, and we are...but our son...Joe, I've never had anyone...step up or want to step up and be his father and I know you will just as wonderful with our daughter. We love you." Tommy says softly, eyes glowing.

"Tommy, you've given me so much, a family of my own...OUR own.... Now how about names? I have one in mind..." I trail off, my eyes never leaving Tommy's...and I love the fact I can see matching bands on our fingers.

"Crying...but so worth it! "He exclaims before then adding "I would LOVE to hear the name you have in mind!" Sniffling, as I carefully wipe his tears away and kiss him feeling him smile into it.

"I would love...because I think it's super adorable to name her Lola...Lola Grace...what do you think?" I ask nervous, but Tommy quickly assures me by smiling.

"Lola grace...Lola Grace Perry.... hmmm, I love the way that sounds. It's perfect Joe.... It's perfect...oh!! she's really kicking now; she loves her name!" Excited now, as I place my hands on his stomach feeling our daughter Lola kick away.... then everything fades....

I wake up and realize that my face is wet, but a smile tugs at the corners of my lips that I can feel. I know what my heart was telling me in my dream, I truly feel it's a matter of time. I can't help but think of Tommy all the time and think of being a family with him and his son. I don't care if it takes a lifetime, All I know...is I love Tommy...I am vaguely aware of sunlight filtering in thru the curtains and the daily routine takes over...morning workout, breakfast and heading down to the basement studio for practice, my thoughts once more returning to Tommy. It's been weeks since we've spoke, he hasn't yet called me...and again, I have this feeling he will call at not only an unexpected time but when he REALLY needs someone to talk to...my heart breaks at the reason I'd feel he'll call...

Speaking of phone calls, I am taking a break and my cell rings, lucky me...I remembered to bring it with me: Hmm...It's Brad.

"Hey, good to hear from you? Doing, ok?" I ask.

"Yeah, I'm doing ok...you sound happy, happy, and concerned both.... Let me guess, Tommy Thayer?" Damn he's uncanny, Brad's always been observant and too he's a good listener and a good friend. He's in much the same way I am... So is Steven, horny as he is...which in part he tries to fill the emotional void that way, I tried that once or twice...doesn't work.

"Yeah, I'm...well, I'm happy because I am in love...I FEEL that I am in love. I've never felt that before...his voice alone...I mean I feel in my heart that well eventually it may happen between he and I, it will...and I don't care how long it takes, it will be worth it. I am very concerned because I haven't heard from him, and I am worried...that he'll call when he's at his lowest point and THAT kills me." My voice cracks at the end, and I hear Brad sigh before he then answers....

"Is it ok if I come over and talk to you in person?"

My hackles immediately raise, and I get a sinking feeling. "Is it something bad? Is he hurt? Do you know something?" Frantic now.

"Whoa! I didn't mean to freak you out...I just figured it would be easier to talk in person. Something we both really could use." Brad says, which reassures me a wee bit, not much. We chat a minute more and then the line goes dead, with him being on his way. I rake my fingers thru my hand in a nervous gesture. Brad did little to reassure me, but he was right in saying we needed to talk in person....it WOULD be easier. After what feels like an eternity, Brad arrives and is soon sitting in my living room, both of us have lemonades, raspberry.

Brad eyes me worried but says, "In a way I have heard from Tommy, not from Tommy himself but from his drummer and friend Eric Singer...speaking of which before I get to that...Eric and I have been talking—" Here a blush graces his features. "And, well I've asked him to go on a date...which God, I am so nervous for. We've been talking on the phone, he's funny, sweet...never fails to make me smile even just talking on the phone and his eyes are like the sky, beautiful. Damn, listen to me."

"I am happy for you Brad, I saw you talking to him....and Steven, thankfully I haven't heard from him. It's far too early in the morning to hear him." I quip, before clearing my throat after taking a sip of lemonade. "He was eye humping Paul Stanley SO badly, surprised Steven; s NOT in traction or Paul."

Brad snorts in amusement, "Yeah, I think we all could feel that but, in all seriousness, Steven's a good guy, and I believe he really does like Paul. Stevens always had a crush. I can tell you see that too." He sighs, "Eric...well, he's talked, or we have about Tommy. Eric says ever since the press conference, he's been acting stranger than usual. He's worried, Tommy is carrying so much guilt, thought I and everyone else does not blame him. Eric didn't give me details, but I figured out...what we saw that day is the tip of the iceberg. Tommy is bottling everything up...not good, the only thing that is keeping him alive right now is his son." Brad has silent tears streaming down his face and now, I too am in the same state.

"Y-You...think, he may would harm himself or want to?" I croak out, horrified at the thought.

"I can't say, I hope to God NOT. Tommy from what I know, is an amazing mother to his son...and he tries, tries so hard to hide his pain, to make his son happy, take care of that little boy...." Brad pauses and looks at me thoughtfully even thru the haze of tears I can tell. "I know you love him; I know....and I can tell you would wait forever if you had to. Don't give up Joe."

"I feel so strong...that, what I am afraid of will happen but also just as strong...that eventually one day we will be together. That's what my heart tells me, and my heart tells me it won't be easy but that it will happen..." Quietly, sniffling trying in vain to wipe my tears. "I dreamed about him...I haven't dreamed about anyone like that in years. But I dreamed we were married, I had adopted his son Evan and Tommy...Tommy was so fucking radiant and beautiful...I felt the love...such as I've never known and he was pregnant with our daughter and I named her, Tommy loved it...and Brad it felt so real."

"It will be man...It will be, and it WAS real." Brad sniffs, "Rehearsals start not too long from now, about mid-April and you'll see him then."

"I know I will." I whisper, we talk for a while about band stuff and Brad talks about Eric, He's head over heels, which I can't blame him, and we gossip for lack of a better word. Brad was right he and I needed this and too we even jammed together at some point, night fell, and I ended up fixing dinner before Brad headed home and then I was alone---

Now I find myself in my bedroom, it being late at night and there is a moon out and I have the strangest feeling...that Tommy like me is staring up at that same moon as I am now, him feeling so lost. Someday Tommy, things will get better...I promise you...I promise you; I will do whatever I can to make you smile, truly smile and to be there for you in any way, treating you like the beautiful Queen you are.

A/N: Sweet dreams or...are they indeed glimpses into Joe and Tommy's future? Worries and concerns and it seems now Eric and Brad will be dating or going on a date, next chapter is the first of two parts, Rehearsals for the tour. Stay tuned my friends!