Let the Heart Do the Talkin': (An Aerosmith/Kiss Love Story)

Chapter 7: A Late-Night Visit (Joe Perry)

When my had phone rang....my heart had dropped.... though I knew it was coming, still it broke my heart, when I realized it was Tommy. I'd seen him in what I'd thought were rough states, but the sound of his voice, he'd reached his breaking point...he'd NEVER sounded so broken as he did. I knew immediately what I had to do, I had to go to him.... I knew or figured he was dangerously close to hurting himself if he hadn't already and the stress wasn't good for him. I stayed with him the while time on the phone and didn't let go until I got to his door....

Which brings us too now:

I've just walked into Tommy's living room and my heart sinks, pale.... face and eyes swollen practically from crying so much and I can tell he's trembling, and he looks shocked to see me here.

"Tommy? I'm here...I'm here."

"Y-You.... wow...I mean...no one's ever.... I mean..." Tommy stammers and then whispers, "You kept your WORD." I can tell Tommy is very much struggling to not panic, or have a panic attack again, so I do what I feel, and hope will help him, sit on the couch and before I can hold him to ground him, he practically dives into my arms desperate for human contact, needing someone.... needing me.

"Tommy I will ALWAYS keep my word, always...Now, please.... please try and calm down. Remember what i told you? Close your eyes, take deep breathes and picture the things that make you happy and you need to let EVERYTHING out.... Nothing you could ever tell me would ever make me hate you or have nothing to do with you. I won't judge...could never. But first just breathe." Softly, tearfully.

"Just don't let me go..."

"I won't Tommy. I won't." Never will.... not if I can help it. It kills me to see Tommy like this.... he will need time to recover, time for him....to rebuild. But where this is ultimately headed, will be worth the wait. I calm down Tommy enough to where he can talk, he refuses to let go of me not that I'd want him to, but shifts to where he can see me better and begins to speak...

"I should start at the beginning...I'd met Jamie as a teenager, I thought truly at the time that he really liked me, was attracted to me....and shortly after Black 'N' Blue was formed. The thing is I THOUGHT, it was always thought.... thought Jamie cared. Come to find out, he only wanted someone to use and abuse, we made it big at least some in the 80s and I met Gene, Paul, and Eric Carr and eventually Eric Singer. But my 'relationship' with Jamie, He'd do things like you are doing now, except they HURT. He'd whisper sweetly in my ear words of 'love' which were really poison, cut me off from family, from friends...choked the life out of me literally. He lied about coming from an abusive home, I'd felt sorry for that bastard.... when we began dating, if you could call it that...we never went out, I had to cook.... clean, I was his servant. I was never alone, never had peace. He started hitting me, would beat me daily...I have scars...scars where he'd put out cigarettes on the inside of my thighs, cut me where it wouldn't show. And there's sad to say more...." Tommy takes a deep shaky breath, "It was a living nightmare...for many years....I thought that was what I deserved, I didn't trust anyone...Jamie would get to them I thought or maybe he did...Kiss did what they could, I started working with them, managing, producing and the like...things I really loved doing...but it wasn't enough....then came....Evan.....the fighting was really bad....sexed always been forced...he'd hurt me and get off on it...but Evan....the last straw...I don't even remember when I got pregnant...I'd always wanted children, I want more now...but, that fateful day I left Jamie.....i was skinny, ugly....and he gave me my worst beating, my stomach had begun to cramp...there was even a little blood. He was gonna fucking kill me, so I ran after he passed out and went to the hospital or I should say a kind stranger took me and I freaked naturally.... they told me I was pregnant....and then I'd thought I'd miscarried or would...but Evan...his little heart was strong...and I KNEW...he was meant to be here. They kept me in the hospital though for a month, Evan was fine...but I needed to gain weight and take it easy...but my life, my life.... was in tatters, and I'd never gotten over the trauma." Tommy is spent, my continues telling me EVERYTHING.... things he didn't already tell me, things I don't think I'd have survived. Yet he seemed lighter somehow, but I had to say...

"Tommy.... that was...VERY brave of you to tell me all that. I am PROUD of you...I know it wasn't easy, isn't. But how do you feel?"

"I feel.... much better.... lighter that I've gotten out everything I've bottled up. I again...can't thank you enough for helping me get my life back, truly back Joe. I can deal with things now better I feel...I just...my nightmares, they still come...or I am afraid they will. I get bad insomnia...but I mean.... there is something else I haven't told you...all I will say is it's not Jamie...I'm not sure what it is, what the things I have noticed mean...all I ask is that I have time....and maybe you can help me figure it out?" My eyes widen, I know exactly what Tommy is really referring to with that last line, he's so confused about THAT. His heart and mind are not yet one...but my feelings for him aren't one sided...I won't push, I'd wait forever for him if I had too.

"I'll give you all the time you need Tommy and help you figure things out, remember you never have to deal with your burdens alone, they become lighter when shared.... now, as for the nightmares? I was wondering...if I could stay and make sure you'll be, ok? And do you have chamomile tea?"

"You're right...so right. You'd stay for me? "Tommy is very shy.

"Yes, I feel you shouldn't be alone." Tommy sighs but nods in agreement and proceeds to tell me where his kitchen is and said Chamomile tea is, I make him some put in some milk and honey. "Here... should be soothing. Always helps me sleep." I hand the mug to him.

"You Joseph Perry.... I've never had anyone outside of my family...be so nice to me.... now, I've told you some things I love...you need to return the favor." Tommy takes a sip of his tea, sighing with satisfaction.

"Well, I love to cook.... love the blues, Rock too of course...and I love gardens, flowers.... i just feel so at peace in a place of such beauty. And.... i love playing pranks on Steven Tyler."

Tommy fails to hide his snickers at the last part...

"Hmm...you may have to give me some tips and tell me some stories then." My heart flutters. Tommy gradually finishes his tea, and quietly asks me to follow him upstairs. "I don't .... I mean...do you want a guest room?" He's very much flustered before it seems a thought occurs as we stop outside a closed door, which I assume to be his bedroom. "If you're comfortable, I have a super comfy chaise lounge." Tommy opens the door and his bedroom screams Tommy...It's beautiful! And indeed, the chase lounge DOES look comfortable. Tommy rummages around producing extra pillows and blankets and sets it up.

"Tommy?" Tommy turns at my voice. "Thank YOU...you didn't have to do this..."

"I wanted to. "Quietly. "It's the least I can do."

"Hey.... i don't care if you wake me up.... I'll help keep those nightmares away...." To my surprise he dives into my arms, wrapping me in a hug which I return. And I do NOT wanna let go.... Tommy putters around afterwards, going to the bathroom, which I follow suit after him as I get comfy on the...wow...damn...Tommy was right about this chaise lounge!!

I lay there for a while, and I think Tommy is asleep when I hear....

"Joe?"

"Yeah Tommy?" Wondering what he's gonna say and loving the way he says my name.

"You're amazing.... just... I mean you have this way.... i can't tell you how much tonight you are calming me down means...not complaining about how late it is and MEANING what you've done and do...I mean it's amazing." A mere moment later I can tell he's asleep, his breathing evens out and deepens.

"I love you.... someday very soon, I will tell you when you are ready. Until then, I will still be here." I whisper, before closing my eyes and I begin to dream....

A/N: Tommy told Joe all about his past, opened and is now going to truly recover and get back his life...seeds of a romance, comfort and more. Next chapter will see what happens when they awake.... friends for now, them getting to know one another. Stay tuned!