MY OBSESSION | P.J.M

43.

Jimin

[dog]

I managed to land a job at the same company that Taehyung works for. Well truth be told, Taehyung helped me out a ton to get that job, and for as long as I can remember, he has always helped me out in life. He told me that he knew the boss well and that they needed someone like me to work for them, and once I applied, I secured the job.

In retrospect, Taehyung has practically molded my life. As far as I can remember, his presence has infiltrated my life and I honestly think it was for the best. Taehyung was the one that suggested all the scholarships that I applied for and he even helped me settle down abroad. Despite being the same age, it feels like he has 10 more years on his back than I do, so I've always seen him like an older brother because of that.

I wouldn't have come this far in life if it weren't for him. So in that way, I have a lot to thank him for despite resenting him to a certain extent.

He technically is the reason why I can't meet m̶y̶ y/n even though I'm almost dying to just hold her again.

I was at first excited to come back to the life that I had previously abandoned. What I failed to take into account was that things weren't going to stay the same. I, for some reason, believed that my friends would stay the same, that my life wouldn't grandly change.

I was wrong.

Nothing, except for the street we're driving on, is the same. If I didn't know any better, I would think that the seasons are different as well. I shouldn't be surprised at this change but I wasn't prepared to lose someone dear to me and I most certainly did not expect my closest friend to be different.

I look into his eyes and I see him hiding. At first, I thought he was in debt and that he was ashamed to see me because of it, but he seems to be doing well financially considering the amount he spends on alcohol. Maybe I'm just being paranoid, but I feel like there's something I don't know and he doesn't dare to speak a word of it in front of me.

Perhaps that's the reason why I can't really see him when I look at him.

I've tried to make him open up but that man is like an obedient dog to himself. He has managed to raise himself in such a manner that he never disobeys his own rules.; a no will always be a no in his book without a fail. I know that I've mentioned numerous times that he and I were close growing up, but the truth is that I actually never felt close to him. There's an untouchable distance between us, I cannot describe it despite feeling its presence so strongly. Perhaps it can be that I don't remember much from my childhood that makes me feel distanced from him.