Glimpses

Chapter 24

November 6th, 2021

Logan had played out the scenario of telling Rory about his issues that were subsequent to those they'd already shared - Vegas and the way they'd ended things - a number of times in his head. 

Rory seeing his back tattoos, asking something about them and him going into a lengthy explanation that was deeper than just the ink, was always how he'd imagined it would happen. It was heavy enough that he didn't want to just outright say it, he wanted her to ask, and him to answer her without hiding anything. It was probably going to be more than she would expect but the tattoos seemed to serve as a topic opener. He'd already missed one shot to do it when she'd asked about the wolf on his chest. But he hadn't lied - the images held no meaning, at least no major meaning.

It was for that reason, that after basking in afterglow what must've been closer to an hour in each-other's arms, he knew that once he got out the bed, his back to her, that it was probably at that moment that it was going to happen.

He excused himself to go to the bathroom, not bothering with clothes. But to his surprise, Rory simply propped herself onto her elbow and watched, not saying a word, her blanket by now pulled over her chest on to keep warm in the fairly chilly room.

As he returned he was actually kind of disappointed. Wasn't she curious? Maybe she, in fact, wasn't a fan and that was the reason she didn't ask? But it was not like he'd had them done because of vanity, hence the latter wasn't something he required from her as such - he just hoped she didn't hate them as removal was supposed to be a bitch as far as he'd heard.

Logan slipped back under the blanket, wanting to feel her body against his skin again. She radiated heat, her skin was still so incredibly soft - it almost felt like her body, while being in contact with his, charged him somehow, not to mention the erotic aspects of two naked bodies touching.

"Can I tell you something?" Logan began, feeling like he just needed to say it, so it wouldn't feel like he was keeping something major from her later on. He was propped up on his elbow too, subconsciously reflecting her position. For a moment he touched her by her waist, wanting to regain some intimacy, but settled for a gentle stroke.

"Logan...," Rory chimed and frowned her eyebrows, not understanding why he was even asking.

"I need to tell you something about the past few years," he said, and sighed.

Rory's forehead now showed some of her wrinkles - she looked worried already.

"I am not telling you this for sympathy or as an excuse for anything... and I promise I won't go too much into Odette and I," he added, wanting to rule some of her potential worries out beforehand.

She caressed the side of his face with the back of her hand, assuringly. Logan took that hand in his instead, kissed it and just held on to it, feeling that it was the kind of support that he needed right then.

"I just need to tell you that the past few years have been a mess for me. I've had some issues," Logan began, exhaling deeply. "I've looked for solutions, but I just need to tell you that I'm not sure it is something I am fully healed from. I'm better, definitely. I wouldn't be here if I wasn't. I knew that I needed to fix whatever was wrong before I even considered contacting you again. I don't want to be a burden or anything like that," Logan explained.

"Logan, just tell me," Rory urged, feeling nervous at his hesitation.

"I guess in simple terms, I've struggled with depression, and some obsessive-compulsive habits. Some of it was, is, a form of self harm...," he said, and waited for her response.

"Depression I know," Rory replied, being no stranger to it herself, even if she'd never officially been diagnosed. "But self harm?" she asked in shock, and already at that thought she couldn't hold back her tears.