Glimpses

Chapter 36

November 27th, 2021

"It's going to be okay," Rory assured Logan, and squeezed his hand, seconds before planning to get out of the car in front of her childhood home. She realized that it felt like a much bigger deal going in there than it perhaps should've been. Certainly a much bigger deal than going to her dad's had been.

She didn't like to admit it, but she was nervous too, and the assurance - saying those words out loud - was just as necessary for her as to Logan.

"I don't exactly have the best track record with her," Logan admitted, and rubbed his face with his palm.

"But unlike anyone else you've tried to rise above it," Rory replied, recalling both the letter and asking for her hand in marriage, putting it poetically.

Logan certainly had plenty of experiences at raising above various situations - from business settings, clearing up his father's messy relationships and business lawsuits. But also with Odette there had been a number of times he'd had to clean up her messes as well - dealings with the yellow press when she'd partied a little too hard, flings that had threatened to destroy her reputation, career or family relationships.

But this was his mess.

And Lorelai had in many ways been right about him the first time - that he had been a privileged, spoiled brat who for a long time treated women perhaps not in the most respectful manner. He really hadn't been good enough for her daughter, not by her standards at least. But if anything, having someone to doubt him, had been one thing that had made him want to be better, do better.

Lorelai was a woman whose opinion mattered to Rory a great deal despite her being the age she was, also being now far more independent than she had been back in college. Logan knew that too. She was a woman whom he needed to at least not be against him.

The trouble was that Logan honestly didn't know why Lorelai was supposed to like him now. Not after everything that had happened. How was she going to believe he was serious this time, that his intentions were pure, his regret real, and show her all the ways he'd changed? With Rory it was different, because Rory understood her own partial blame too - but knowing anything about Lorelai - she was definitely about to focus on the facts she had.

In Lorelai's eyes he was fairly sure all he was was the guy who'd kept her daughter on the side while engaged to another woman, no matter their casual arrangement, who'd chosen another woman over her daughter, who'd left her daughter heartbroken and pregnant, grieving all alone, and making desperate decisions. He was now the divorcee with a messy past who'd just waltzed back into Rory's life and swept her away, messing now with a lot more than just Rory's life this time. Even he would have hated himself if he had been in Lorelai's shoes.

"So what does she know exactly?" Logan asked, feeling like he needed another minute.

"The basics - she doesn't know about our exact agreement during London, but I've tried telling her that it wasn't something you'd talked me into," Rory said, not wanting to use the term 'Vegas' anymore. "She knows about the miscarriage, that I rushed into things from there on," she continued, adding, "she knows that we go to therapy. I think she knows that I'm happy?" she added, being a little uncertain about the latter. She hoped Lorelai saw that, she usually did.

"Does she know about what happened with Odette? The news?" Logan inquired.

"Not that I know of, just that it wasn't your baby. Jess, I think, did most of the googling though," Rory shared.

"Great," Logan replied, regretting leaving that much of the gossip out there, thinking back. But he knew that even if he took down every original post, there'd still be tweets and posts and memories which couldn't be erased that easily.