Glimpses

Chapter 28

November 14th, 2021

Em was out like a light in her carseat after three bites of the cheese and bacon scroll Rory had taken with them, the crumbs still on her jacket, just like Rory had anticipated.

"It was really good seeing Honor," Rory exhaled, glancing back over her shoulder to check on her sleeping daughter in the back seat. She'd let Logan drive back, having enjoyed a couple of mimosas after Honor had suggested she should enjoy herself along with her, and Logan naturally hadn't objected.

"She always liked you," Logan replied.

"I missed her too," Rory admitted. 

The image of an alternate universe where this had been just a regular family visit - the three of them a family - that Honor had briefly mentioned, still lingered in her mind. It wasn't without any hurt, but it was a nice thought.

Logan cast a glance back in the rearview mirror, and reached out for her hand, holding it just for a few seconds, before putting his hand back on the steering wheel. He glanced back at the mirror, making sure the girl was still asleep, aiming to not cross any agreed-upon lined.

Rory's smile assured him that she hadn't minded that, and it was all that Logan needed in that moment - to let her know wordlessly, just in case Em was hearing more than she showed, how much he'd missed her too - all those years. Thinking back to all the time passed, all that time feeling miserable that Logan hadn't even directly connected to Rory for years, subconsciously trying to avoid the pain, was coming back to him now - time and time again making him regret not having done what he'd done in May sooner. He only had himself to blame. He knew he probably wouldn't have had the strenght in him earlier than that - he'd just been so defeated, feeling so alone. But it didn't mean he couldn't wish that he had.

"You know she asked me...," Rory began. "You know, when you were saying bye to Linus and Conrad," she added. "She asked me when we'd be coming back again. She really loved it," Rory said, her daughter's words having really touched her.

"And we didn't even get to the horses," Logan commented, feeling very happy inside. Sure, it was an unfair amount of entertainment the girl had been subjected to - what 4-year-old wouldn't have loved something like that? But Logan chose to believe that it was more than just the fancy magic show and big house - that place had radiated warmth, and his sister was easy to like.

"Even back in college I used to wonder how you two grew up into such great people," Rory said, knowing that Logan knew that she didn't mean that in a bad way. The shortcomings of his parents were no mystery to either of them. But Rory had been one the first people Logan had ever talked seriously about them, beyond complaining about them or just making fun of them. What he'd lacked, what had hurt, how Honor had always been there for him even if they'd been at separate schools.

But now Rory had just really been in awe how great of a mother Honor had turned into over the years. Sure, she had plenty of experience now too, and she knew that the two of them had had some pretty incredible nannies growin up too, but still - becoming an entirely different person compared to Shira was a huge achievement. Honor was a working mom on top of everything too.

"I think you know well enough that we're not perfect," Logan replied, smiling humbly.

"Well neither am I," Rory replied and squeezed his arm gently. 

While there could've been guilt, pain or something equally depressing attached to that sentence, it came out with a flirty tonality instead. Despite the initial bumpiness of their day - seeing people they would rather have not seen or people asking Logan about London, thankfully not about Odette, the day had really left her with a good feeling that maybe this could indeed become the new normal. She just truly felt like she'd been shown the ultimate goal right there - the three of them being a family. And for once she felt like with him she didn't even need to be perfect, just like she didn't expect perfect from him. She just needed to be as close to perfect in being a mother to Em as she could be - that would be enough.