Lost Love [H.S]

two

4 October 2020

A day spent with Capri singing, dancing around the kitchen while we bake together will always be my favourite type of day. She is such a little ray of sunshine, a bright little girl who is always happy. I admire her, I admire her happiness.

I miss Posie throughout the day, she's my little snuggler and I do truly miss her hanging off of me all through the day. I have considered homeschooling her but I don't want that to negatively impact her anxiety. If I stop her from facing her fears then they'll slowly get worse.

Capri and I made cupcakes today, she wanted to make them for Anne so we're taking them over there later today. I left her to decorate them while I got ready for the day. She took half an hour to decorate the cupcakes and she was so proud of them.

I got a phone call from the school around midday, apparently Posie has just been really upset all day and asked if she could come home. I've loaded Capri into the car, her singing along to the music that plays on the radio.

The school doesn't want to just send her home when she's not physically ill, they didn't want me to come to the school but if she's this hysterical still then I am. Usually, she calms down after ten minutes of being in school and around her friends but it's been four hours, she's clearly having a really bad day.

I want to bring her home so she's comfortable, I want her to know that I will drop everything to go and get her. I'd fly around the world to get to her if she needed me.

"We gettin', P, now mummy?" I hear Capri ask from the backseat as I park into a spot in the school car park.

"Mhm, she might be a little sad so make sure you don't say anything that might make her more sad." I turn around to speak to Capri, she doesn't really have a filter due to her age so she just says what she thinks.

Bit of a blessing, bit of a curse.

She uses her fingers to pretend to zip her mouth shut, keeping her lips shut as she tries to talk to me before shrugging. I playfully roll my eyes at her as she smiles at me, climbing out of the car and helping her out of her car seat.

I keep hold of her hand as we walk towards the doors of reception, I hold the door open and Capri skips inside and plops herself down on one of the brightly coloured chairs. I head over to the woman behind the glass windows, "hi, I had a phone call about my daughter Posie Bianchi."

"Oh yes! She was sitting with the nurse but I think she was sent back to class." The receptionist explains to me and I nod along. I can't imagine they sent her back to class hysterical but it wouldn't surprise me one bit.

"Could you please excuse her from class? I would like to speak to her and decide whether she should come home or not." I request even though I know she's coming home with me.

"Yeah, I'll go down and collect her from her classroom." She smiles at me, standing from her chair and heading out of the office.

I head over to Capri, taking a seat beside her on a chair and watching her happily swing her legs as she points out things on the wall to me. She's so excited to start school next year, I can't believe she's grown up so fast.