Monster ~a.b

fourteen

Days later...

Girls day, also known as gossiping about everything and everyone. Katie and I would always find ways to talk about something, even if it was with us or around us. Todays topic was love and sex. Did I think of it differently? Yes. Was she on a rampage about? Most definitely. Years back Katie was in love with a guy, and no I won't say his name. But this man would do anything to keep her happy. One night she called him crying about a rumor she heard around school. Instead of lying he told her the truth. Since then, she doesnt think of love, even if shes found her soulmate. She uses alcohol to forget, pot to remember and music to feel. We were both two completely different people, that's why we always clicked. Growing up I never thought of love as a way to have sex, but to Katie sex was love. She never understood why I was against it. When i told her i fell in love with Alex she was dumbfounded, she wasn't sure why I told her that, but it was true. I opened my heart to someone, only to find out they were a monster within. Now as I sit here, rocking back an fourth, sobbing I finally understood life. He never loved me. He loved the idea of having me, to use as a puppet. I just didnt think I would react this way. Dont get me wrong. I did some horrible stuff, it just hit me hard, and I still dont know why.

"Its okay". She mumbled into me, my phone screen shattered by my feet. "He's a dick. He doesnt deserve you". She fed onto me. But was he? I at least had the decision not to send him pictures of intimate moments between me and Austin and all we have done was kiss a few times. Alex was having sex with someone, and sent me pictures.

"I'll take you to get a new phone okay? We'll block his number and make due with what happens next" she spoke.

The picture still burned into my mind. Her legs wrapped around his waist, his tongue down her throat. I was set up to believe him for so long. Our moment cut short when Mike, Austin and Troy walking in. All eyes on me.

"What happened"? Troy asked.

Katie dropped her one arm to reach for the phone, bringing it up to show the guys. Mike tensed us and knelt down next to me.

"Alana, it's okay." He mumbled.

"Easy for you to s-say". I cried. Troy now in my sight.

"I'll kill him". I heard Mike say to Austin but Austin's eyes never left mine. He grabbed Mike's arm to stop him.

Katie let go of me and pulled my arms. She wrapped me into a hug and Mike and Troy joined, Austin was distant. I would do anything just to have his arms around me. I needed a comfort zone and he was it at this moment. It was like he knew and he he walked behind me and hugged me. His hands resting on my hips, his fingers tracing small circles there. I felt my eyes tear up again as my friends embraced me.

**
*

I laid on the bed as they all went out to eat. I couldnt bring myself to be in public. I just couldn't stop crying. I flipped through the channels, wiping my eyes. A knock on the door only made me groan. I got up, wrapping Austins flannel around me and when I opened it, nobody was there but a box on the floor. I glanced around the hallways, seeing nothing in sight. I picked up the very light feeling box and shut the door, setting the box on the counter. I debated whether to open it or not. But my hands made it to the lid. I opened it and when I saw what was inside I screamed, hitting it on the floor. I crawled over to the corner, bringing my legs to my chest. I couldn't grab my phone fast enough as I dialed Mike's number.

**
*

All the guys paced around the room as Katie held me in her arms. The box no longer in sight of me.

"A fucking finger. What the hell did this mean"! Mike fired as he hit a water bottle away from him.

"Was it for Alana"? Katie asked but Mike and Austin shook their heads.