Number One On The List

Liar, Liar/ Hate Ne

The biggest  liar in this moment was me. It had become Liar Liar, asshole on fire. There may have been no going back to the way things used to be. I hated being the peacekeeper sometimes because it cost me my happiness and it had made me such a goodie-goodie. A person who had given in whenever someone needed me.I played Stone Temple Pilots Daisy and it was more beautiful than Never think and that was because of the style. And with no vocals it just gave chills and made you want to cry while listening.

Nothing else mattered in this moment but the music, not even me. Things had been getting worse and this was the one thing that could temporarily make it better for me ,playing. I wasn't sure what he thought about before, but I knew what he was thinking about now. Wynrie. Her beautifully gorgeous Orange and black hair and her perfect shyness. The way her eyes showed the feeling in her life the sun shines in the sky.

Daemon had began to cut that same night that he thought about her. He couldn't help but feel like he fucked up with her and had no chance and he might have been right but he wouldn't know until he talked with her. He was afraid to talk to her about it because he felt embarrassed for having lost her. He made cutting a minimum of five time a day his daily habit. Life had such a funny way of poking at the bears.

I couldn't resist the urge myself so I began to cut but the placement was different from his. I cut on my arms and my chest and back and his was on his thighs and arms. We both tried to hide it as best as we can and push through the stinging and itching pain. The blood wasn't even an issue because we knew how much was too much and we were able to control the way we thought even at dark times.

Hate me because I know you need to to feel better about the way things went. They wouldn't change though so there wasn't much closure. School became difficult for the both of us because of how much more we'd have the routine and some days where it would change. I noticed that Rhaven was hiding more and hurrying off more. Noticed how weird Wynrie was acting too. Almost as if they both had something bothering them and had no idea of where to start talking about it.

Daemon and I would lock eyes whenever we'd take notice of how strange they were becoming and just had to shake it off and do our cutting in the bathroom at school or in our rooms at home. I also started drinking alot of alcohol and he just smoked cigarettes like a psycho. I began smoking increasingly more than I ever have and it was definitely noticable. Things seemed clear the more I drank because I realized that they were cutting and that's why they were acting weird.

Cigarettes and Whiskey or Jack Daniels was what I chose as my drugs of choice and his was cigarettes and beers. The beers never did much of anything for him,  just gave him a buzz. I was the one that got wasted most days and nights. I would take the shit to school with me on a water bottle or something and not share (obviously) and just walked out whenever I felt like it and people did notice that. They took notice and  they started mumbling about it and speculating and I lost the care so it made me smile.

I smirked when I lit up because I knew most people would just leave me alone but there'd be a few motherfuckers who would say something and they'd make me fight 'em.