If I Stay✔️

63

L E O

"So..." Charlie paused, his voice hesitant. "Did you have fun?"

I turn away from the moonlit street and glance at him. I'd never seen Charlie look so nervous. His face is twisted, almost as if he's terrified of my response. His fingers are tapping against the steering wheel with an unsteady beat, and his eyes are drifting between the empty road ahead to my amused face.

Seeing my expression, the tension in his shoulders disperses a little.

"I think this has been the best day of my life." I tell him honestly.

He looks somewhat surprised at the awe in my tone. His smile bright and blinding as his pearly whites come into view, my own lips lift ever so slightly. I like that I've made him smile with honest words. I didn't lie to him when I said this has been the best day of my life. Charlie made me feel like I belonged today, like I was more than everything my mind made me believe. He made me realise that not every day is dark.

"Really?" He asks, his voice an octave higher.

I nod. "Really, really."

"Out of ten, what would you rate it."

"Ten, Charlie." I roll my eyes. How can someone so smart be so stupid? "I just told you it's the best day of my life. Of course it's going to be a ten."

Charlie shrugs. "You could've gave it an eleven."

"You said out of ten." I frown. "If you wanted an eleven, why not say out of eleven."

He shakes his head, not offering me any response as we pull into the parking lot of the teen home. I unclip my seatbelt with a heavy hearted sigh, I really didn't want this day to end, at least, not yet.

Charlie scans his identification badge against the keypad, effectively unlocking the door and allowing us to enter the deserted reception. I'm not surprised by the lack of people, with it being a little after nine pm, I knew most kids would either be in their rooms getting ready for bed, or in the games room for a bit before the staff called lights out.

"What did you think of Ty?" Charlie asks as we head towards the stairwell.

"I think he's my favourite DeLuca," I lie. I don't think I'd ever be able to like anyone anymore than Charlie right now.

Throughout these past two days, with everything he's shared, Charlie has shown me that you can still be happy despite the trauma you've endured. His strength is admirable. He has survived through my greatest fear. He lost his older brother, the boy who was a hero in his eyes, and yet, with that smile he wears you'd never know.

That smile that was never fake.
He was never the facade that I allowed myself to become.

Like Charlie, I knew the pain of loosing a sibling, I lost Lily for ten years. But his pain was beyond bounds from being understandable to me. I was young, a two year old with no idea of what the word grief actually meant. I felt grief from those around me: I knew what sadness was from an early age, because they taught me how to be sad. Whether they meant to or not.

My brothers, in a way, they added to my grief. They included Lily in everything we done, despite her absence. They never hid their emotions or thoughts when it came to admitting that something was missing. And whilst I love the fact that my sister was never allowed to be forgotten, a part of me wondered if I would've turned out like this if they hadn't held onto that hope so tightly.

In the end, hope was on their side. Lily returned to us, and everything was great again. For a while, at least. Charlie would never know that weightless feeling, he'd never cross paths with Liam again, because Liam was gone.