MY SECOND BUT TRUE LOVE #Wattys2016

CHAPTER SEVEN

Days passed like they did. Slow and empty. I felt helpless as my thoughts kept betraying me. The memories consistently rewinds in my mind. I close my eyes and I see him. I open them and they search for him. First love is impossible to forget but I wish I could completely move on. I've grown tired swinging between these inconstant feelings. Sometimes I control myself and it seems like I've made it but then there are moments when each part of mine misses him. I knew all along that I had to face this some day while on the other hand I wish this time flew as fast as the good one did. I always find myself questioning that why do happy days get over quickly? And why do sorrowful days stay for so long? But some questions remain unanswered.

I was alone before he came and now when I've walked a few steps with someone, it feels immensely lonely to continue solo. My love for him is eminently deep and it shall remain this way forever. A portion of my mortal heart belongs to him and it always will. No matter if he is deserving or not. What worries me is that he has carried on with his new life whilst I'm still stuck in the trench of past. I can't spend more of my time reminiscing my first relationship. I've to move fro. I've to save my soul from sinking further into the sea of sorrow. And I believe there is no saviour who is going to rescue my drowning spirit. But whenever the feelings start fading away, something clings on and holds me back. I'm willingly resisting to stay, I'd move on only if I knew what I lack.

I have spent almost twenty minutes searching for the right clothes to wear but I indulged in the depth of thoughts as usual. When mom told that we'll be visiting the household of the old couple, the only thought I had was that it is going to be boring. However, I remembered that Amarion said he was going to be there. It wouldn't be that boring then. I grabbed my purple long sleeved tshirt and black skinny pants. The collar and cuff of the top were black. I tied my hair into a braid after wearing the clothes. I decided against taking my bag.

The house was about thirty miles away. I had never been there. The only thing that excited me was seeing Amarion. I don't know why but I sense some hope from him. The hope of getting my lost spirit back. The twinkle in his eyes and the smile on his face had me awestruck. Maybe spending time with him will aid me to get myself out of the quick sand.

We reached the house and witnessed a lot of cars parked. My younger brother saw a friend of his and rushed to him. I nervously walked to the main door. An old couple welcomed us and took my parents where the adults were. The woman asked my name and complimented that I'm pretty. I smiled at her and thanked for her kindness. She seemed friendly. She handed me a glass of squash and gestured at the staircase. I nodded and approached the stairs. I climbed slowly and looked around for Lily and Amarion. When I reached the first floor there were two doors. I heard some noise behind the nearest one and decided to enter the room. I lowered the handle and stepped in. All of the children inside stared at me. I smiled embarrassingly and made my way inside.

"Hey" Lily yelled and came running. She hugged me and took me to the rear of the room. "We were waiting for you. Brother was like when will she come? " Lily rambled. I felt shocked when she said that Amarion was impatient for my arrival. I shifted my gaze and saw Amarion seated. As soon as he witnessed me approaching, he stood and heard Lily's words. He scratched his nape and I grinned at him. He responded with a wider grin and moved his hand forward for me to shake. I glanced at his hand and then at his face. I hesitated at first but then shook hands with him. He looked deeply into my eyes as we shared the handshake.

"How are you?" He asked but didn't let go off my hand.

"Good and you?" I questioned and loosened my grip on his hand.

"Same" he replied and slowly released my hand. His fingers slightly moved from my palm to my fingertips.

His touch sent a shiver down my spine. I gulped and broke our eye contact. He sensed my uneasiness and offered me to sit. He was dressed in a red tshirt and denims.