chapter 25

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So, i did it. i kissed mattheo. he grabbed the back of my neck to deepen the kiss. i grabbed the back of his hair. he put one hand on the front of my neck and pushed me against the wall. i looked up at him before he smashed his lips onto mine again. i ran my fingers up higher into his hair.

his hair was soft and his curls wrapped around my fingers perfectly. his lips were soft. it was like we were in sync. he pulled away to catch his breath. he grabbed my waist and pushed our bodies closer together. i felt his cold lips touch my neck.

Merlin he's hot.

i wasn't worried about somebody walking in, i wasn't worried about being a deatheater, i wasn't worried about my father or anything. mattheo took all my worries away. he made me feel good.

"i want you mattheo.." i whispered in his ear while he kissed my neck.

i felt his lips curl up into a smile against my neck. i felt his head lift for a moment.

"show me how much you want me" he whispered back.

i hurried up and took off his shirt, revealing the same abs from the ones in my dream. he untucked my long sleeved shirt from out of my skirt and touched his cold fingers on my bare waist. he slowly lifted my shirt off as he touched my lips with his. once he reached my sleeves he hurried up and pulled away and took off my shirt, revealing my dark mark. he looked at me for a moment before kissing me again. he lifted me onto the couch behind us, laying me down with him on top of me. he put both arms on either side of me and deepened the kiss.

i don't know what this man is doing to me.. but i love it.

i was allowing this boy to touch places no one else has been. other than somebody who i didn't even want to touch me this way.

i caught a quick glimpse of his chest before he smashed his lips onto mine again. he had scars all along his chest. one stood out to me the most. it was a long light colored line going from his shoulder to the bottom of his pecs.

i pulled away and caressed his scar. he looked at where my fingers were placed than back into my eyes. he took a harsh breath and looked away from my eyes.

"it's from my father" he stated in a raspy voice.

"why would he do that to you?" i questioned quickly in a quiet voice, still looking at the scar. i traced my fingers along it and felt the bump it had left on his skin.

he looked back into my eyes then at my shoulder where my scar was. although the difference was it wasn't from my father and it was there for a purpose.

The initials, T.N. laid on my skin.

"what's that from" he pointed with his eyes at the bumpy skin on my body.

He knew exactly what it was from. he just wanted to hear me say it for reassurance.

i glanced at my shoulder than back into mattheos eyes. Theo had carved his initials into my skin one day when we were still together because i was talking to a boy. he wanted to let everybody know that i was his. which i'm not, and i never was. i never wanted to be his and i never will. he just can't accept that.

"it was, Nott..wasn't it?" he said slowly.

His voice was calm and soothing. i felt safe when he spoke, knowing he was there for me. i've never felt that way before.

i nodded in response while he looked at my scar. he thought for a moment then grabbed something from his pocket.

"well..." he stated.

Click

"you're mine now" he added.

he brought his hand closer to my shoulder. i couldn't tell what he had in his hand but i had a pretty good idea what it could be.

soon enough, i felt a sharp pain come from my shoulder. i whimpered in pain which made mattheo cover my mouth with his other hand. a few seconds later he released his hand from my shoulder.

Click

he took his hand away from my mouth and i breathed heavily.

he had changed the initials from T.N. to M.R.

he kissed the newly opened wound. leaving blood on his lips. i let him carve his initials into me. i allowed it to happen. because i didn't mind being his. the thought of being his made me feel safe. it made me feel like i was protected. unlike theodore Nott.

I wanted to be mattheos and i always will. i want people to know i'm his. i want his initials to lay upon my skin. i want his soft lips on mine all the time. i want it. i want it all.

I want him.

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