49| Black To Red

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There's a shadow by the door where Jungkook waits for you on the other side.

You shut the book in your hand, feeling so vengeful—so angry and disgusted and repulsed all at once that it makes the room tilt in agreement.

It's late in the morning now, and the sunlight is so harsh in this library room that it burns your skin like a curse. How was it even possible?

How can any ten-year-old child have the heart and mind to commit arson and attempt murder all in one night?

There's a permeating sound in the back of your brain that makes you giddy. None of this sounds real to you but it makes you so freaking mad. Raged.

In a moment, you hear a knock at the door, and you swallow, fisting your hands as stand to walk towards the door. There's so much you want to say you're not sure where to begin.

Jungkook's waiting for you outside, and you can feel the tension between the two of you rise like a phoenix.

He's wearing his work clothes. A navy button down and black pants. You try not to acknowledge how good he looks.

Standing face to face with him after reading all that he did sends a scary current between the two of you. It's like you don't even know him.

"Red–" he starts, then takes a look at your face. "Are you okay?"

You nearly laugh.

Is he okay?

Has he ever been okay? Or was he just as psychotic as he was 18 years ago?

Jungkook's eyes slip down to the diary in your hand and that's when his whole demeanor shifts. There's a dark halo in his eyes that makes you shiver. "I was going to tell you."

You clench your teeth. "You didn't. You wanted me to find out this way so don't act so surprised."

"Red—"

"Don't call me that," you retort quickly, and he frowns at you.

Words...words...where do you even begin?

"You're sick," you snap, and he flinches, visibly.

This is not how you planned it to go. You wanted to handle this by keeping your cool but your anger is choking you, ready to just explode any minute.

"You don't mean that."

You laugh, hot blazingly. "Oh I fucking mean it. Unless you wanna tell me that what I just read was bullshit?"

His lips part in response, and he turns back, as if to make sure Junghyun can't hear him before he inches close to you. "What you just read--" he says. "Is not entirely true. You have to believe me, Red."

You swallow, not ready for the verbal confirmation that what you just read was exactly what happened 18 years ago. "Did you want to sleep with me so bad that you couldn't bring yourself to tell me?"

Something snaps in the air and Jungkook's eyes narrow at you. "Watch your mouth."

He has no right to be angry. You step towards him, feeling his heat. "What do you mean it's not entirely true? Even if it wasn't, how am I suppose to be okay with the fact that you were even involved with my mother's death? I know what you went through, Jungkook--you were scared and paranoid but I can't justify that when this is about my mother."

Jungkook stares at you through his cool, hawk eyes, daring you to say more.

"Look--" He says. "You're speaking out of spite. I'm sorry I couldn't bring myself to tell you sooner but it's part of my plan to catch the real culprit. For now, I can't tell you much."

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