My Best Friends Brother // Supernatural

Chapter 89

It's been a couple of weeks since what happened, I have been avoiding any type of talk. Sam has been weirdly okay since the trial, Dean is walking on eggshells around me and Kevin is the only one who's actually been treating me normally "find anything kid?" I ask placing a plate of eggs and bacon in front of Kevin who's analysing the angel tablet again "working in it, oh wow thanks" Kevin replies, I give him a wink and walk over to Dean placing his place in front of him and kissing his cheek, then his neck "mhm" Dean whispers into his coffee mug "thank you" he says turning to face me, our faces our centimetres away "eat you food" I peck his lips "where's Sammy?" I ask, I run to my room and come back with a blood bag "he's gone on a run" Dean says, I sit down "wow what a freak" I joke, Dean smiles and nods "that's what I said" Dean replies

I give him a smile "I love your smile" Dean says and it gets a little bigger "so do we have a hunt? I'm itching for one" I say drinking directly from my blood bag, Dean is stuffing his face but shakes his head "Sam is better with research, Cas called yesterday but that's all" Dean says, I nod in just watching him and my whole body is set on fire, I chug down my blood bag as Dean finishes his food "Dean could you help me with something?" I ask "of course, anything" he says, I smile and pull him away "what do you need he-" he begins saying once we are out of sight, I kiss him roughly pushing him against the wall "that I can help you with" he whispers picking me up and taking me to his room, he lays me down on his bed and hovers over me "we never stay here" I say "I think you should move in here with me, we're married, we sleep together basically every night" Dean whispers, I smile "we never talked about it before" I chuckle "then let's make it happen" he replies

"Yeah, let's" I say leaning up to kiss him "but let's do this first" I whisper "yeah" he replies pressing his lips to mine

Dean gets up to get me a blood bag while I sit down on his bed, I think I've only been in here once since they came to get me but I love it. Everything in this room screams out DEAN and something about it really comforts me, my room reminds me of our little hunter, so maybe moving in here will feel like a fresh start. I see a picture frame with the picture flipped backwards, I grab it and open it up, it's a picture of Dean, Ben and Lisa from a few years ago. He looks really happy, this Ben kid looks like an almost identical copy of Dean. I flip the picture back over so that it's showing and put it back on his desk, I'm not sure why he turned it in the first place

He's taking a while, I throw his shirt over my head and I can hear Sam and Dean whispering "how is she doing?" Sam whispers "I mean she's not talking about it, and she's using sex as a coping mechanism. Not that I mind but, it's a lot of sex I mean she's horny all the time. Which is great" Dean over shares and chuckles "Dean, that's way too much information" Sam says and I can tell that he's scrunching his face "she needs a hunt so tell me you've found something" Dean says, I walk in " did you?" I ask, they jump and turn to face me "what? Forget I have super hearing and a very soft walk?" I ask, they don't say anything "I told you I'm fine alright? I walked into that battle on my own" I say "Crowley said something" Sam says

"he said I was battling with my humanity? Right? I am, of course I am. I walked into a trap and killed my baby because I refused to let you knuckleheads walk into it without me. And as bad as it is I would do it again, yeah it fucking hurts but what can I do? Sit in my room, curled up crying about it? Or use that anger to kill the bitch?" I ask "yeah, you're right. You're a Winchester after all" Dean says, I shrug "this is our life, we are hunters. We don't always get to win, we lose people, and she isn't the first one we lost" I say "now please tell me you found something" I say "we did, there seems to be an angel attack on some priests in Colorado" Sam replies, I nod "what else? I know these angels are probably after Cas since, you know. He was siding with Naomi when the whole thing was blown to shit" I say "the people that were attacked, there were signs of torture on them. They're trying to get info, so we need to find Cas before they do" Dean says

I nod, what about Kevin? What good will it do him being alone all over again? With Crowley in the basement, it's worse. You lost one kid this week already, what if he bolts when we're away. I sigh "you know what? Keek me updated" I say turning around "o thought you were itching for a hunt?" Dean says "I am itching for a hunt, but someone needs to watch Kevin. Leaving him here alone with Crowley? I have a bad feeling, what if he tries to go find his mum alone? I'm sure the demons are itching to take a bite out of him" I shake my head "are you sure?" Sam asks, I nod

The boys go to their own rooms and I follow Sam into his "you've been real quiet lately" Sam says, I sit on his bed cross legged and watch him pack "I don't know what to say, how did you deal with it? When that happened with Jess?" I ask "I dealt with it because you were there for me during it" Sam says, I nod "I don't know how to feel either, I mean it kills me. I fight constantly with my other self, everything inside me tells me to turn it off" I say "and why don't you?" Sam asks, he's folding his clothes and placing them in his bag "because of you boys, I don't want you to see me that way. Trust me, you boys keep me human. And that's because I care about you, take that away and I'm left with nothing" I say, Sam sighs "you're keeping your humanity for us?" He asks "yeah" I say "but you want it off?" Sam asks, I nod. I can't hold it back anymore "because it's killing me inside, I should've listened and I didn't and now my baby is dead. She was everything I ever wanted and now she's gone" I say

Sam sits next to me "what would you have done?" I ask "when I lost Jess?" He asks, I nod "I would've turned it off the moment I saw her burst into flames" Sam says "you're not your best self right now, and maybe you just need the time off. Let Dean and I take the wheel, you stay here taking care of Kevin and making sure Crowley stays put. We'll come back and forth to see you, I'll watch Dean, he'll watch me. You need to rest your mind, cope with all of this" Sam says, I rest my head on his shoulder "how do I cope?" I ask "don't hide what you feel, let it out before you explode" he whispers, Sam pulls me into a tight hug and just lets me cry for a little while "keep an eye for Dean, he's been so quiet through all of this too" I say "I will" Sam replies

I go to the garage with them, Dean kisses me softly keeping both hands on my cheek "we'll be back before you know it okay? Sam restocked the fridge so you should have everything you need there, if you need anything please call me" Dean says, I nod. He kisses me again before hugging me "I love you" he whispers "I love you too" I reply. He gets in the car, Sam hugs me too before getting in the car

I give them a wave and watch them go