The flip of a switch || Tommyinnit SBI adoption

Chapter 44

********* Tommy's pov *********

I woke suddenly, shaking all over, breaths short and sharp. 

"It's not real it's not real it's not real" I murmured to myself quickly as I tried to take deep breaths. Suddenly I heard a loud bang from outside, and I jumped, hyperventilating even more. 

"It's him, he's... he's come to get me... Tubbo... help... It's him... not  safe.... him.... not safe...help..." I felt my throat closing in and panic flooded me, as tears streamed down my face. 

"Wilbur..." I cried quietly, trying to stand up but falling to the floor from shaking too much. I crawled into the corner of the room, pushing myself as far into it as I could, wishing for it to end, and trying to make myself completely hidden in case Edward was coming. Then I heard footsteps outside my door. 

"Edward... its him... no... no no no no no.... not safe... not safe... Techno... need Techno... Wilbur..... help..." I couldn't breathe my short breaths were tiny gasps and I could feel myself getting light headed from lack of oxygen. 

Then Techno was there, comforting me, telling me to breathe. I was still shaking, but after ten minutes or so I was breathing regularly,  and the tears had stopped pouring down my face. 

"Hey, you're ok, do you wanna talk about it?" Techno said, calmly. 

"No," I sniffed, hiding my face slightly. I still hated being so vulnerable, but at this point I was waking up every night, and I was kind of used to it. "I..." He said nothing so I continued, "I see him everywhere. Every time there's a dark shadow or a noise behind me I think it's him, I can't... I... I can't... e... escape," 

"Shhh it's ok, you're gonna get through this ok? We're gonna get through this, together, " He paused for a second before saying, "Lets talk to Dad in the morning, ok?" 

"Ok," I whispered. 

I don't remember when, but at some point after that I fell asleep, and woke to Techno lying on my bed next to me, wide awake. It had been weeks since me and Tubbo first started school, almost 3 months, and he had some friends, Jack and Purpled I think they were called. He had hardly spoken to me since, and I wasn't sure what I had done, but I hated it. If Tubbo, my brother, who promised never to leave me, wasn't speaking to me, it must be bad right? I deserved to die.

******** Phil's pov ********

I groaned, taking a deep breath. The boys were all at school. I had spoken to Techno and Tommy that morning, and they told me... a lot, about the night before. I was worried about Tommy. He was clearly traumatised, and Techno had been given new schizophrenia meds, but he was still recovering, and sometimes didn't take them out of fear. Wilbur seemed better, but some days he hardly spoke, and seemed almost lifeless. It was improving though, slowly. Soon all my boys would be ok. I realised with a jolt that it had been days since I had spoken directly to Tubbo. I had been completely ignoring him. Shit, I had messed up. I told myself I would make it up to him tonight, we could watch a movie together, and I could talk to him and apologise. Oh I had messed up so, so bad. 

******** Tommy pov ********

We arrived home from school, and I dumped my school bag on the floor dejectedly. 

"Well boys how was school?" Phil asked us. 

"Alright," I replied, avoiding the question, and staring down at the wooden panelled floor as I made my way towards the stairs

"Ohh Tommy come on it can't have been that bad," Wilbur said, jokingly, catching my arm. 

I gave a small smile, and an exasperated sigh, "It was ok," I replied, shaking my head. 

"That's Tommy for ya, making the best of the extremely bad situation that is school," Wilbur responded, whilst laughing. Then he paused before saying, "I'm really glad we fostered you Tommy, you fit so well into our family," 

"And Tubbo too," Phil added. Apparently this was the wrong thing to say. 

"Oh my goodness, Fuck off!" Tubbo yelled, suddenly, making us all jump. I flinched and backed up a little, knowing shit was about to go down. "It's always 'and Tubbo' isn't it!? Never about me! Always Wilbur this, Wilbur that, or Techno are you ok, and you taking your meds, or Tommy we're going to wait on you hand and foot so you don't go jump of another fucking bridge when it fucking suits you!" He screamed, with exaggerated gestures. 

I felt my heart stop. They didn't wait on me hand and foot did they? Was I being too needy? Would I go jump of another fucking bridge when it fucking suits me'? Was it all just for attention? I'm being a spoilt brat. 

Wilbur and Techno were stood there in shock.

"Tubbo... Phil started quietly, before clearing his throat and stating again, "Tubbo I realised today we've been ignoring you, and I'm so so sorry, I was going to try to start making it up to you. There's just been so much going on and this isn't an excuse but it isn't your fault and I'm so sorry," He rambled, looking heart broken. 

"Maybe it's too late," Tubbo spat, "You're not my family, none of you," 

"What did I do?!" I screamed at him, a sudden burst of anger filling my veins, "I've tried to be nice, even though you've been ignoring me since I got back from the basement! I've tried to include you and talk to you and spend time with you and you wont let me! You've been horrible!"

He stepped closer to me, waving his arms in my face as he yelled "Omg don't act like this is my fault, i've been completely excluded from this family," 

"But not by me! I tried to help and you turned me away! What more can I do? I just don't understand. You promised that we'd stick together, and be brothers forever!?"

Tubbo stepped towards me again, so he was now right in front of me, looked me dead in the eyes and said the words that hurt me the most, "I promised we would stick together, but that promise ended when we stopped being brothers."

For a minute I stood there in shock, time seemed to have stopped, and suddenly Tubbo was apologising, "I'm sorry Tommy I didn't mean-"

I pushed him away with all my might, so he fell to the floor with a thump, and then I ran out the door, into the night. Just like before. 

IM SO SORRY THIS IS SO LATE IVE BEEN REALLY BUSY LATELY ADN I TOTALLY DID NOT FORGET ABOUT THIS! WONT HAPPEN AGAIN! also tho i remember when I started I was like "Imma update on alternate days" and look at me now... haha... ha... ha...

anyways hope you enjoyed!

Stay safe, stay happy, stay healthy, stay kind!

Word count: 1170