Kaleidoscope (a Heartstopper fanfiction)

Seagulls

Nick took Charlie to the beach. He didn't tell him that was where they were going, though. Just told him they were going to meet at the train station. Nick bought the tickets in advance, so Charlie wouldn't see the destination.

It was lovely just to be on the train, out without anyone else they knew around. Just Nick and Charlie. Together. Their train car had one other person in it, but they spent the whole ride drawing, paying no attention to the boys, who held hands while Charlie tried to guess where they were going based on what was passing outside.

When they got off the train, Nick took Charlie by the hand, put his other hand over Charlie's eyes, and led him down the main street. Because it was a Sunday morning, everything was closed and there was hardly anyone around at the moment.

"We're nearly there, I promise," he said when Charlie protested.

Above their head, a seagull squawked, and Charlie gasped. "Wait. Seagulls?" Nick pulled him to a stop, took his hand off Charlie's eyes, and grinned as Charlie's face lit up. "Oh, my God, the beach!"

"Yeah. Surprise!"

"Oh, my God!"

They took off running toward the water, standing there looking out across the ocean together.

"It smells so good," Charlie said. "I can't believe I didn't smell it when we got off the train."

"Me, neither. I thought it was going to blow my surprise completely." He reached for Charlie's hand again.

"What shall we do?"

"Everything!"

So they did. They rode the carousel, and they took stupid touristy pictures, and they walked down the boardwalk together, and Nick fulfilled the promise he'd made himself: He took Charlie's face in his hands and kissed him, right there in public. And he didn't look around to check if anyone had seen, because he didn't care. From there, they stopped to eat fish and chips—well, Nick did. Charlie picked at his share, which admittedly wasn't very good—and they found a photo booth they just barely fit into, with Charlie on Nick's lap, laughing and kissing each other as the booth took their picture. The photos were really cute, and they looked so happy with one another. Nick carefully tucked the photo strip away in his backpack, wanting to keep it forever, and never forget this day.

Then Nick spread the towels he had brought out on the sand and they lay down next to each other, enjoying the sun and the waves and just being together. Charlie shared his earbuds with Nick so they were listening to the same music.

Nick turned his head to look at Charlie. He'd never been so happy. And Charlie had done that, brought him so much joy. He wanted to make Charlie as happy as Charlie had made him; and he really didn't care anymore who thought what about who he was. Nick was comfortable being bisexual. It felt right; it felt like him. Maybe it was time he stopped being afraid and just started being ... Nick.

"I was thinking," he said to Charlie. "What if I came out?"

Charlie gasped and smiled, sitting up. "Do you really want to?"

For the first time, he hadn't said Nick didn't have to, or assumed he was doing it out of guilt. Nick counted that as a huge step forward. He sat up, too. "I really want to. I know I've been pretty unsure of everything for a while, but, like, I'm definitely bisexual. And I don't want to have to sneak around pretending we're platonic BFFs. I'm not saying I want to have a public announcement or anything, but I want to tell the people who matter." His mum, first and foremost. He felt guilty that he had ever doubted her support. Now that he had reached a place where he was comfortable with who he was, he was pretty sure she would be, too. "And I want you to be able to tell people, too." That was the most important part. Charlie had been forced to hide this piece of his life for far too long, through no fault of his own.

Charlie was smiling as broadly as Nick had ever seen him, and Nick couldn't believe how lucky he was.

"Oh, my God," he said, "I like you so much. And ... I love liking you." He couldn't remember what it had felt like to not like Charlie, and he didn't want to. The way he felt filled him completely, and he couldn't sit still under it. He got to his feet and ran into the surf, shouting at the top of his lungs, "I like Charlie Spring in a romantic way, not just a friend way!"

Behind him, Charlie came running down to the edge of the water, standing there looking at him with that brilliant smile.

Nick turned to him, wondering what he was thinking. "What?"

"I never thought this would happen to me."

He wrapped his arms around Charlie and pulled him close. "Me neither."

After a moment, Charlie said hesitantly, "Nick?"

"Yeah?"

"Does this mean we're boyfriends?"

Nick pulled back and looked at him, surprised by the question. "Yes! Was that not already established the last ten times we made out?"

Charlie shook his head, clearly not having made the same assumption Nick had about it. "Oh. Yeah? I don't know, we never, like, confirmed it." They both laughed, and Charlie asked, "Why are we like this?"

He was totally ridiculous. Nick bent and picked him up, carrying him out into the surf.

"What are you doing?" Charlie asked.

"There we go. Come on. You're my boyfriend!" he shouted to the surf and the seagulls. "I'm your boyfriend! We're boyfriends!"

"Don't you dare drop me!"

"I'm not going to drop you." He pretended to for a minute, though, laughing as Charlie's arm tightened around his back.

"Stop it!"

"Okay. I think we're wet enough now." Nick turned to go back to the beach. Likely he would regret his wet shorts and wet shoes later, but for now it was completely worth it.

He put Charlie back down on the towel and lay back, holding out his arms so that Charlie would come into them. Charlie rested his cheek against Nick's chest, but after a moment he lifted his head, looking up at Nick questioningly.

"So ... now we're going to tell people?" he asked.

"Yeah."

With a happy sigh, Charlie put his head back down and they lay there together. After a while, Charlie said softly, "Nick?"

"Yeah?"

"This is my favourite day ever."

Nick smiled. "Mine, too."