White Room Two

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Why was I like this? No matter what I do, I'm never happy, I have my moments where I'm distracted, but it's just that. I'm distracted. I'm sitting in this room again. It's so blinding as if I was inside the sun's core.

This snow-white couch with a blanket wrapped around myself as if it was the only thing keeping me together. I stared at my hands. They were gripping so tight to the blanket as if it was going to disappear.

I'm vision was burry, the tears I had been trying to not let fall were clouding my vision. I'm alone, I'm not good enough, why do I stay? Always, always I'm thinking of this. I hate it, I just want it to end. I brought my hands up to my hair as I started to pull on it as my cheeks were covered in my tears.

I screamed as loud as I could, someone, anyone, please stop this. I felt my scalp scream in pain from me angrily, pulling my hair as if this pain would make it stop. I was a prisoner in my own damn body, nothing makes it go away. "(Y/N). Please look at me."

I looked up to see Itadori softly grab one of my hands that were entangled in my hair. He was frowning as I said, "I'm fine." He sighed, sitting next to me as he said, "No, you're not (Y/N). Let us help."

It's just my mind playing tricks on me. He's just a character, nothing more. My other hand was taken as I looked to the other side of me to see Choso. The tears hadn't stopped, I had been crying so hard that I started to cough from how bad it had been.

"You've been here for us. Please let us help you." Choso put an arm around my shoulder as I cried, I only got louder as I pushed them both away from me. "YOUR FAKE, YOUR NOT REAL STOP FUCKING WITH ME."

I pushed myself closer to the couch as I gripped my arms so hard I started to leave indents in my skin. I didn't want to hear them out, how could I? Am I that alone that I can't even get a real person's words? I refused to listen to them, I can't. I felt arms wrapped around my shoulders as I glanced back to see Toji.

He glanced down at me as he said, "We may not be real but we've been there for you before so why can't we now." I was staring at him my tears slowing down as I saw Gojo next to him as he said, "Yes. He's got a point (Y/N). Well always be here for you."

I glanced down at my hands my vision still blurry as I cried out, "Why? Why can't I just be happy? Why do I rely on fictional characters to do it for me? I'm I really that weak?" I felt someone put their hand on my head as Toji let go of my shoulders.

I glanced over to see Nanami. "You struggle because people betray you in your eyes. We can't do that." Tears filled up my eyes again, he was right. They can't hurt me because their not real. Someone hit his head as he groaned in pain before I felt someone take the spot Itadori was in. I looked over to see Junpei.

He looked at me with a soft smile and said, "I know how you feel. Your a lovely person but only we can see that." He placed his hand on my back rubbing circles on it as I heard someone else chime in, "Your beautiful (Y/N). Why do you stain your face with those tears?"

It was Nobara. She sat in front of me as she placed her hands on my knees. I gagged seeing as how I had been severely crying for who knows how long, "It just won't stop. No matter what I do I'm always trapped."

She shook her head as I felt someone wipe my tears away. It was Tamo, he had a frown on his face and said, "Those tears of yours only makes you stronger but for right now we're here to tell you your ok." I moved his hand so I could rub my eyes and wipe away the tears but someone stopped me.

Both my hands were grabbed a bit harshly as Sukuna said, "You'll only make it worse if you do that. Let us help you." I couldn't say anything, I had nothing to say. "Don't be harsh with her, she can do what she wants." Megumi said as he grabbed your hands and softly put them down in your lap.

"Why? Why do you want to help me so much? I'm lost." I said refusing to look at any of them. "Because your important to us. Our bonds wouldn't be so deep with you if you hadn't watched us grow (Y/N)." Todo said standing next to the couch.

I gripped the blanket that laid across my legs as I wiped my tears with one arm. I wasn't crying anymore but I'm still confused, why can't I just be happy. "Your strong (Y/N). You've made it this far." Maki said hugging from the side where Choso sat before.

I leaned into the hug as I sighed defeated. "Tuna Mayo Kelp." I heard Toge say as I smiled a bit. "You guys, without knowing always give me a light to see." I mumbled out before one of my hands were taken.

I looked up to see Yuta as he smiled awkwardly and said, "Then please. Stay longer to see us grow more. We may not be real but you are the reason we were created. To be the highlight of your day." I smiled as I said, "Thank you guys. I really wouldn't know where I'd be if I hadn't found you guys."

I felt everyone go in to hug me as they said, "We love you (Y/N)." I'm happy I found them, although they may not be real their to closest I can get to happiness for now but I'm just fine with that.

Bonus-
Toji, Gojo, Sukuna, Choso, and Maki were all circled in a ball making a plan to go after whoever made you feel like that. They looked like children planning a prank but way more deadly. It make you laugh at their actions.

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Although I may not be a therapist I know the feeling of being in a place that you can't get out of. A steep hole that makes you forget what made you happy as you think, 'Am I ever going to get better?' I've been there plenty of times, an empty shell but always remember. No matter what it is, whether it's a show or a hobby or sleeping that gives you comfort, don't let it go no matter what anyone says. Your life and emotions are what you can control, although they betray you just remember that your still alive and you'll always have that one bright light in the dark that gives you joy. You think you don't deserve it? Dead wrong, everyone has suffered, no one's suffering is better than another's. We all foght different battles everyday and in the end, even of you feel hopeless there's always that one thing that makes you happy. I give you all my love and support that no life is too small and anything that you guys give me whether it'd at comment to a vote that you all are the highlight of my day. Never hold yourself back just because others disagree because I will always stand by the people I care for. I love you all and no matter how you've been feeling I hope you have that great day I always wish apon you. :)

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