It Wasnt My Fault (DNF)

Part 2: Chapter 41

George pov (still no dreamy boi)

It had been a day since I'd heard Ken's story.

I'd been considerably quieter, only really talking to Clay.

He was the only one I could trust right now, despite the other two telling me their secrets, I couldnt trust them.

I could only rely on Clay.

Only Dream.

I wished the other two weren't here right now.

I wished it could go back to being only my boyfriend and I, happy.

Because that's what we were before we were reminded of the fucked up world.

Happy.

Content in each other.

Now my whole life had been lain out and my worst side had been on display for Dream to see.

And that still scared me.

Gods, why was I always scared?

I didnt want to be, but everything in my life was made to be a secret, everyone in my life carrying them on their backs.

Until I was left to trust one person who had been the most transparent with me, consequentially still keeping his own past hidden on his shoulders.

He didnt seem burdened by it, and that helped me to ignore its presence.

We were walking to school, finally done with out autumn break, and I found myself happy to have some normalcy.

Ha, normalcy.

I almost wanted to laugh aloud at the word I thought I'd obtained so many times.

At this point, I was almost able to brush off the need for stability, embracing my fucked up life, smiling at the thought of my troubled mind, and finding humor in my traumas.

I didnt care, but for some reason, this didnt scare me.

It didnt scare me that I now didnt care how bad my life had been.

And that I didnt care how bad it got, was another source of freedom, another weight that didnt need to be added to the already lessening pile of burdens upon my bearing.

We walked hand in hand, smiling at each other every so often.

I didnt know if Clay had gone to a school before now, and I didnt need to ask.

He didnt need to tell me.

We were here, in school, right now. And we were together, no more longing in our hearts.

I hadnt seen Ken since he told me his story at dusk to ease my troubles, and the truth was, I didnt want to see him.

I was content with only having Dream.

Is this what it would be like when Ken could haunt me no more?

Free?

Is this why he wanted me to stay on the earth?

So that I could feel the resemblance of happiness that was coming my way?

I still loved my brother, despite my complacent disposition towards him.

I would forever be in his debt, but I knew we both had an idea that this day would one day come.

The day my social life took the frontier to the life I lived at home.

Home.

I was finally able to call the apartment that again.

And it was all because of the blonde that was now standing beside me at my locker.

I grabbed my books from the metal compartment, slamming the door happily and giving Clay a quick kiss on his cheek before leading him off towards class.

I'd spoken with the school councilors, rebelling against their wishes not to allow my schedule to remain identical to my boyfriends, letting them know I would be with Dream despite what they decided.

In the end, they had kneeled to my verdict, and I was able to remain with my love the entire day.

I would never have left him alone in a place that festered so many disgusting people, in the devils construction cave of depression.

We'd just gotten a little bit better, I wasnt going to allow the dumbasses to take advantage of that.

I still sent my signature glare to everyone around me, warning them to stay away from me and my own.

They never messed with me, knowing I was unstable enough to attack them without remorse.

I would laugh until the end of my days at the fact that their fears and concerns were true; I would beat them bloody if they said a single thing to Dream without his consent.

I didnt want to be popular, and I didnt want friends.

I didnt care if I was the gossip of the school, it's not like I listened to anyone anyway.

I didnt give two shits if they all hated my existence, because I knew that I did, too.

There was nothing that they could feel towards me that I hadnt already felt about myself, so why should it faze me that they shared my opinion?

I walked around the school with confidence that day, glowering at passerby and exchanging chaste kisses with the love of my life.

I was quiet, but I was badass at it.

And they were all quiet, too, so did it matter what I did to keep them that way?

It was lunch time, and I was sitting in a table in the back of the cafeteria with Clay, leaning on his shoulder and eating, sharing whispers and giggles.

Neither one of us could care about our sexualities and how they were observed by the student body.

We didnt care.

And why should we?

If we were able to replicate happiness by being disassociated to everything around us, who was to tell us that we were wrong.

School was better than I could ever imagine it being.

I had someone there with me. They're for me in a way that my brother never could have been, despite the care he provided me with.

We stepped inside the apartment, our day being a loop that led us inevitably back to the same place.

The place that still shone with the ghost of a memory, of times better than even this was.

This time, the memories were welcome, not able to bring out any festering feelings in sobs that wracked my body.

Because for the first time in my life, I had no other feelings beside love and happiness.

Okay, how we feeling?

Gogy went and had a self-realization time and he's feeling better-ish now.

I'm gonna try and get out the 5 chapters I promised, as this is the fourth one, but I might not have the time.

I'll try tho.

I luv u all

1066 words