Before It Sinks In (EDITING)

25 & 26

I was out of my house sitting on a bench in the cold night, surrounded by silence. Enjoying the calm it bring. Looking at the dark sky that brought me peace.

"Can't sleep?" Prim asked slowly approaching me before sitting next to me, still waiting for my response.

"Hmm... Yeah. I might be feeling a little homesick." I told her honestly. She looked away sadly.

"D-do you still plan to go back home?" Her question got me thinking. Do I?

"Honestly, I still don't know. I don't even know if I still have anything to go back to."

"You can stay here for good, you know. I'll take care of you. I'll stay by your side until you no longer need me." She shyly looked away after her bold statement.

Cute. I smiled and ruffled her hair.

"If only it was that simple." I meaningfully answered, looking back at the peaceful sky.

"You can tell me anything, you know. I promise not to let anyone else know. You can trust me." She had this sincere look in her eyes that made me want to actually open up about my feelings for the first time, and so I did.

"Do you believe that a smart person can become stupid because of love?" I started, looking at her curious big brown eyes. "Because I do."

"I was stupid. I forgot myself. I lost myself in the process of loving someone else. I forgot the fact that I would not be able to give what I do not have. That in order to love someone else, I had to love myself. And that was what ended me."

"I loved too much, much more than I should have, so when I lost that person, I lost myself too. I gave everything that I could, disregarding even myself, prioritizing that person over my own. I accepted every pain she brought and eagerly took the little she gave. I was in it too deep, even when I knew that I was not expecting anything in return because in the first place, that person clearly told me from the beginning that they had no feelings for me and that would never love me. So when I was slapped by the truth and replaced by the person's real love, it broke me. Stupid, right? I was so used to loving that person that I feel so lost without them." At this point, I was already becoming teary eyed, as all the memories came flooding back.

I waited for her reply, but instead I felt her stand and hug pull me towards her for a hug. And that's when I lost it. I broke down crying.

"It's okay. I'm here. Just let it all out." I can hear from her voice that she was crying too, but she was trying to sound strong for me.

"I know I have no right to advice or judge you, but know that I will be right here for you. I will stay and listen. I will help you as you heal. Until you can be yourself again."

Maybe. Maybe, one day I will be able to be myself again. I hope I can.

----

"Why do I still see your smiles at the back of my mind?"

"A penny for your thoughts?" A smiling Bright said beside me.

"Oh, hey! How long have you been there?"

"Well, I've been calling your name three times already, but nah, not that long." He flashed me another smile."I brought you some fruits, I picked them on our farm myself, so they're surely fresh and nutritious."

"Thank you so much, P' Bright." I accepted the fruits returning his smile.

"Anything for you. But, that doesn't come for free though."

"Oh, okay? How much do I owe you then?" I tried reaching out money from my pocket but he held my hands to stop me.

"I don't want your money. I would prefer you go out on the arcade with me instead. I noticed you've been locking yourself up here in your shop since you came, so this is me telling you to loosen up a bit. Let's enjoy while we still can." He said moving his brows up and down.

"But, what about the shop?"

"What about it? Nong Prim can take care of it for you, right Nong Prim?" I then followed his gaze, only to find a frowning Prim, who quickly looked away and fixed her glasses when she saw me glance at her.

"Uhm... Ye-yeah. I can handle it here P' Sam. You deserve to go out and enjoy yourself too." The young girl replied sounding sad, still not looking at me.

"Well, then, it's settled, I'll give you time to prepare first. I'll fetch you in 30, okay? See yah!" With that, Bright stormed out of the flower shop as quickly as he came.

I approached Prim who remained quiet, looking like she is contemplating while. Staring at the flowers she was trimming earlier.

"Are you alright, Nong Prim?" I asked, touching her shoulder, which seemed to have startled her, as she moved away a bit.

"I'm good, P' Sam. Don't mind me."

She flashed me a forced smile, so I asked again if she was sure she's okay to be left alone in the shop.

I saw her pouting a bit before answering.

"It's okay. I can handle it. You go enjoy yourself, P' Sam. I hope that will cheer you up a bit. I'll be happy knowing that you're happy."

I ruffled her hair with her answer."Okay, then. Thank you, kid. I owe you."

True to his word, Bright came back after 30 minutes and drove us to the nearest arcade. To be honest, I don't remember the last time I went to enjoy in a place like this. My life was too heavy and burdened with responsibilities before that I rarely got the time to act my age and do things like play.

Bright was such a happy soul. He made sure that we played all games that I liked, never failing to keep a smile plastered on my face on the process. We even played basketball and lost a lot of tokens in the crane game before he finally won me a prize. We were able to play majority of the games in the place and I can say he was good, based on the fact that I am now carrying numerous prizes he won for me. But what he was most proud of is the huge bunny stuffed toy he won on the shooting game. He said he wanted to win it for me so bad because he thought it looks like me. Cute.

"I'm so happy to finally see you smile genuinely." He suddenly said while watching me eat ice cream. I didn't notice that he has been staring at me.

I was taken aback by his statement and the soft smile on his face.

"You know, you look more beautiful when you do. So, I'll do everything to make sure you will always retain that smile." He told me grinning. This made me laugh.

"Whatever, dork." I replied, hitting his cap, making it cover his face more.

"Hey, you can't do that to me! I'm still older than you." He said, which I only answered by having my tongue out and running away from him.

I don't know why but there is something about this guy that lightens up everything. It's like I forget all my problems when I'm with him. Admit it or not, I really like having him around. Weird.

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A/N: Hi! I have to republish this part as chapters 25 and 26 as Wattpad is being a bitch and messing up with the chapters of this book. I hope you understand. 😊