Paper Memories

Chapter 21-I

Chapter 21-I

What if you get trapped in the world of happiness?

Everyone wants to be in world of their best version of happiness. Lately, napapaisip ako kung paano ba makulong sa kasiyahan. Yung di ka na makakalabas kahit na peke lang kasiyahan na yun. Nakakabaliw. At pwera dun, may isa pang dumagdag sa lalim ng iniisip ko, yung gulong pinasok ko. At yung realization na para kay Percival ay wala akong katiting na pagmamahal...

Not for the man who claims to be my painting.

"Is that you, Percival?" Malakas kong tanong sa tao na nasa labas ng kwarto. Both of my arms are now glued on the floor as droplets of sweat fell from my forehead, I slowly bend my elbows as only my arms is carrying my entire weight. Huminga ako ng malalim saka ibinababa ang binti ko sa lapag at agad na tumayo gamit ang momentum ng bigat ko." The door open. Come inside.

Percival push the door."Were you just exercising?."

I wipe my face with towel. Baka magmukha pala akong weirdo sa paningin niya kung inabutan niya ako nag-h-handstand push up." Yeah. I wasn't in a mood for a jog, I just need to pump my blood a little to feel awake----helps in art if I may say."

"Well, then I brought something to energize you, taas tayo?"

"Oh, did you cook? Am I smelling eggs and toast?"

"Yeah, it might be still a little early sp I made something small but filling for you." Paliwanag ni Percival na may hawak na tray. Pinauna niya ako sa paglabas ng pinto, sa pag- akyat sa hagdan at sa pagpasok sa attic. He have his usual beaming smile." Kain ka muna, bago ka magsketch ulit. Malamang napagod ka sa workout mo kanina."

"Mabilis lang, I'm in the mood to draw.." I explained as I place down the sketches I brought with me. Rough draft pa lang ng painting idea ko. I held it up to the light Sorry kung nagising kita kahit 3am pa lang. I'd eat in a bit."

He watched my every move, unblinking. Parang wala antok o pagod."Sila Ellie, Ronald at Ralph lang ba ang i-p-paint mo?"

Nagkibit balikat ako ako, saka nagdagdag ng konting details sa sketch. Tapos ay kumuha ako ng blangkong papel saka itinapat yung sa gilid ng mukha ng boyfriend ko. I remembered the empty canvas he claimed to come from, I smirk as I look at white space of the blankness of the paper." Then you, of course----ipipinta din kita, Percival sa gusto man o hindi."

"It's a no thanks again, Hon."

"But you'd be fine me painting others?"

Marahang tumango si Percival, saka niya inalis ang papel na hawak ko at nilapag yun sa sahig. He started to fix our tray of food again as if not minding how I was trying to provoke him." No, I won't get jealous. If I can, I'd even find you more things that would make you create more art. Lahat ng bagay na maganda, lahat ng gusto mo, Sheena."

I held his cheeks upon his reply. "Since I met you..."

He smiled, hinawakan niya ang kamay ko." Yes, Hon?"

I inch closer as I whispered to Percival's ear." I no longer know what I want."

I snickered as I realize the madness I'm falling into.

Maya-maya nagsimula na kami mag-breakfast, Pero kahit sa pagkain nad-distract pa rin ako sa momentum ng pagguhit, marami idea inspiration ang pumasok sa utak ko na agad namang dumadaloy sa kamay ko.. As the clock ticks by I just draw, have a small bite of my breakfast, chatter with my boyfriend and sink on my own world. I started to feel hot out of excitement and cold ber months wind just drive my adrenaline more.

Pero bigka akong nawala ako sa realidad--- I didn't know how I fell asleep.

"Madam! Madam Sheena! Gising ka na ba? Nandito ka pa?" Naalimpungatan ako ng marinig ko ang boses ni Gregory kasabay ng paghakbang niya papaitaas ng attic. Sobrang aga pero wala siyang pakialam sa nabubulabog niya." Ah! Nandito ka lang pala. Bakit ka dito natulog, Madam? Kanina pa kita tinatawag ah! Sabi mo pumunta po ako ng maaga?"

Dinatnan niya ako nakaupo sa lapag."...Kanina pa ako gising."

Gregory scrunched his face." Weh? Baka nahulog ka pa higaan nyan eh?"

"I was already awake ealier, I didn't know... why I just slept again." Napahawak ako sa bibig ko habang nililibot ng paningin ko ang buong attic. The food of tray is still on the middle of the room and my sketches is scattered as well. Mag-isa lang ako."Umidlip lang ako saglit... Ginamit mo ba spare key para makapasok? And I don't remember texting you?"

"Believe me, Madam? Nagtext ka. Pagdating ko nga bukas yung pinto kaya akala ko gising ka na, bakit iniiwan mo lang yun ng ganun? "Gregory was puffing childishly as he explains." Hindi ka magpprepare papuntang school, Madam? Mag-a-ala sais na po. Ibaba ko na lang tong pinagkainan nyo, tapos hihingi ng agahan."

Agad akong napatayo ng sinabi niyang baba siya." Is Percival downsta-----"

No, no. I can't let anyone know Percival lives with me. And what's worse, my fake boyfriend seems to dislike my driver. At dahil naputol ang sinabi ko pinagtawanan ako ni Gregory." Ano yun? Mukang gutom ka pa, Madam, ha. Kahit pangdalawang tao na nag tong kinain mo. Lakas mo pala kumain?"

"Huh? Uh, y-Yeah. It's not like I'm a small person..."

"Pero sa totoo, masama ba pakiramdam mo? Kanina ka pa lutang."

Pinagpapawisan ako ng sobra-sobra kahit nakikipag-usap lang ako. Wala yung towel ko. I don't have anything else, so I instinctively pulled the hem of my shirt and wipe my face,then I remembered Gregory is in the room! Napatingin agad sa kanya, at ganun din pala siya sakin." Hoy, Gregory, san ka nakatingi----------"

Ah, he's not. He's totally not looking at my chest." Batak ka pala, Madam?"

"Jeez, I just work out a lot. Pinagsasabi mo. Ibaba mo na yang tray, maliligo pa ako." I sighed and fully exited the room. Sumunod naman agad si Gregory na kailangan din bumababa sa hagdan. This fullY tattoed man might not be reliable in a lot of things but he have deceny left on him." At nga pala, yung spare key na binigay ko sayo lang yun."

"Syempre naman, hoy. Loyal kaya ako!" Agad niyang biro, at dahil sa sarili niyang excitement nagmadali siya pababa para sabayan ako ng lakad." Huwag mo na pagkatiwalaan iba! Ako na lang!"

I chuckled." Kahit na binlack mail mo ako dati? Ng drugs?"

Agad namutla si Gregory sa pagbabago ko ng usapan." H-Hindi ko na uulitin yun..."

"Pag sinabi kong sige pagkakatiwalaan kita sa ngayon, maniniwala ka ba Gregory?" I smiled as I watch Gregory try to the same. His lips was twitching as he tries to form a grin." Isipin mo na lang na pinatawad kita. Na may utang na loob ka sa akin, at babawi ka, diba?"