Nothing's Fine

• 48: Swirling •

Things felt off the next day at school. I felt more in my head than in my body, because my mind kept drifting to the situation with Irene. I gave Mason the permission to update Emery to save me a conversation with a million follow up questions.

At lunch, everyone at the table noticed that though I was physically present, my mind was miles away. Despite that, they tried to keep a conversation going, and let me sit there, eating my lunch robotically, not tasting it, just chewing and swallowing.

What is it going to be like meeting Irene on more neutral terms? I wondered. 

Yesterday's phone call was something out of the Twilight Zone. It seemed oddly too simple to just pick up the phone and call someone who'd abandoned me for years – like I was missing a few steps in between. I knew I had to get it out of the way, but it felt like I'd stepped into another dimension as I cordially spoke to Irene on the phone. There was no additional conversation or sentimental moments, just eerie politeness. We decided on a time and place, and that was the extent of the phone call; Wednesday at 5pm at a coffee shop near the mall in Oakridge.

Now, I couldn't help but wonder if I was doing the right thing by agreeing to see her. My mind couldn't stop thinking about all the ways either of us could screw up this meeting and make things worse.

What if it really all was just a ploy to have more financial aid? Had she really gotten her life together that much? What if I said something that made her mad? What if she hit me again?

I swallowed hard, trying to push these fears away.

What if she didn't? What if she apologized instead? She probably wouldn't.

I was too scared to even let my mind wander to a good outcome for too long. The potential disappointment felt heavy as well.

Taking another robotic bite of my lunch, I tried a little harder to pretend that I was actually present in the cafeteria, in hopes of distracting myself from my thoughts.

I walked by myself to music class, as Emery and Mason went their separate ways after math. I considered not showing up for class, since I couldn't play the flute with a broken arm, but I figured I might as well go anyways and catch up on other work. That didn't mean that I couldn't take my sweet time getting there.

As I walked, I overheard an interesting conversation between Tiffany and Kayla. They look upset and I am curious to see if my suspicions are correct. Quickly, I duck behind the corner of lockers and listen in.

"Kayla, listen to me closely. I do not give a rat's ass that you have history with Mason Grey," Tiffany hissed as she stepped closer to Kayla. I was surprised to see that Kayla held her ground.

"Well, you should," she snapped back with the same amount of venom in her voice. I wanted to cheer her on, but instead, I listened closer.

"It barely even counts as a thing and then you screwed it up somehow or broke it off or he did or whatever. I like him now and Charlie is going to pay for getting in the way," Tiffany sneered, her voice low and threatening.

"Are you kidding me? He's finally happy. That's what's important! Leave them alone!" Kayla replied angrily.

"Kayla, that's enough. Shut up right now. Are you on her side or mine?" Tiffany asked. The ultimatum hung in the air and Kayla's face fell. Being on Tiffany's side was hard, but being against her was harder.

"Yours," Kayla mumbled quietly. Tiffany's face twisted into a wicked smile in satisfaction and she straightened her stance.

"Good. Now let's find Holly and plan this," Tiffany replied. I quickly hightailed it out of there, avoiding their path as I headed down the hallway.

My curiosity was quenched for a moment, as I now knew that Kayla and Mason had a thing in the past, and I was right. It was a fact, and not something I just sensed. But the satisfaction lasted for only a moment and my mind was swirling with thoughts as I began to wonder why they split up. I also felt a little threatened because he had both the beautiful Kayla and Tiffany (who was gorgeous as much as I hated to admit it) pining after him.

And while I didn't think about fashion and beauty standards as often as the next girl, when I did, it was easy to realize that I wasn't anything special, especially standing next to those two girls.

I sighed as a new thought passed through my mind. What are they planning next?

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Author's Note: Tiffany & Kayla's chat?? TEA. What do you think Tiffany's planning?? How do you think the convo is going to with Charlie's mom? Comment your predictions! I want to see them! 

New chapter coming next week, so keep an eye out! <3