"I'm tired," I tell you
but what I hide from you, what I refrain from exposing to the bright light
I feel like I'm drowning
but not in the pretty way
thrashing around, just trying to keep your head above water
Still hoping that someone will come and save you
Your lips a pretty blue as you bob back to the surface
it's your body slowly falling to the dark ocean floor
No struggling for a savior
No hope as your arms drift above your head
The pressure crushing the breath from your lungs
Eyes wide and bulging
Sad eyes stuck in time
Never to shine
Concrete fills every crevice of my brain
Cementing the thoughts I want to forget
The best memories slipping through the cracks into oblivion
Static playing over every scene
Muddying the pictures until they are nearly a blimp in existence
My lips sew shut every time I rip the thread
Blood flowing from my lips like rivers
Teeth destroying fragile flesh
Daring me to speak up
Tell someone what I hide behind the stitched smile
Laughing as the words choke me
Ugly monsters wait for me at night
Whispering in my head
Keeping me up for hours
Pill after pill and I still can't fucking sleep
My thoughts running laps through my head
Voices growing and shrinking like a flame
Begging for their turn in the spotlight
Screaming to let them out
Turn after turn
Until smoke rises
Burning my throat
And bringing my weak frame to my knees
I am so fucking exhausted
YOU ARE READING
My Head's Above Water
PoetryLosing the one you thought you'd have forever will really put things into perspective. Life and death, love and hate, the old and the new. Lay back and relax, we're getting over a heartbreak one miserable poem after the other.
