GREEN (RL Harry Styles fanfic)

74. Flicker of White

The next three weeks seemed to pass by like seasons in Los Angeles, completely unnoticed and exactly like every other day. I stuck with what I had learned about surviving Harry's tour schedule and kept myself busy so I wouldn't dwell on the fact that we were apart.

That became a bit more difficult when Harry texted me one Friday evening to tell me Drag Me Down was getting dropped as a single any minute. He and the boys were thrilled to pull one over on their fans, who always seemed to figure out the band's next move somehow. Drag Me Down managed to catch the fans by surprise, probably much like it had caught me by surprise when Harry sang those words he'd said to me. Each time I heard it on the radio I felt my heart ache for him to come home as I sang along like a complete fangirl.

My pregnancy had been uneventful so far. I was almost sad I didn't have morning sickness because sometimes I'd forget that I was even pregnant, then I realized puking was not something to be longing for. Harry would always ask how I was feeling, but with little to report it didn't quite feel real. Oddly enough, whenever I was out and a photographer snapped my picture I was acutely aware I was pregnant. I would worry that somehow they knew, like their camera had X-ray lenses or something. Maybe it was the worry that any day now someone could break the story of a positive pregnancy test in Harry Styles' hotel suite, or notice I'd gone up a nearly a cup size in the past month and put two and two together. Seriously, how did they get bigger already? And heavy. I wondered if I was the first woman to carry twins in her boobs.

*****

Harry stood next to me in a tiny and dimly lit room just an hour after he'd stepped off a plane. We had been led through a back door and straight here to avoid being recognized in the waiting room. This particular practice had a number of high profile clients, which they didn't name– good sign number one. They also had both private appointment times before and after hours and a private entrance– good sign number two. I didn't know Harry's flight info when I'd made the appointment, so we only utilized the back entrance for today's visit.

"Oh my God I'm going to pee everywhere!," I said for the second time. "The female bladder can only hold 14 ounces and I had to drink a hell of a lot more than that." The instructions for the ultrasound said my bladder should be uncomfortably full for the best results, and I had definitely followed instructions.

"I'm sure she'll be in here soon babe," Harry reassured me with a chuckle. "It wasn't that much water."

"Easy for you to say! Your bladder holds two more ounces than mine and you aren't the one trying not to pee on a paper-lined table," I spat back annoyed at his amusement of my discomfort.

"Okay. Sorry babe," he said in a truce but another laugh slipped out. I gave him a glare and he suddenly looked like he was about to piss himself. "I'm not laughing at you, I swear! I'm just laughing that you know how many ounces the human bladder holds. I'm going to limit your Googling during pregnancy."

The door opened and in came the ultrasound technician. She was probably a bit older than I was with a pleasant round face and thin blonde hair pulled into a low ponytail. She wore pink scrubs with cartoon daisies printed on them.

"Okay," she said going right for her seat, "I know you have to pee so we'll do introductions as I get started." Oh thank God she understood my pain– good sign number three in my book.

The yet to be named blonde woman clicked on her computer screen and fiddled with some instruments before she spoke again.

"I'm Gayle, and you must be Olivia, according to my screen."

"Liv, yes. Nice to meet you," I smiled but didn't offer my hand considering she was currently grabbing some sort of ultrasound equipment.

"Hi, Gayle. I'm Harry," he offered a wave from beside me. "What can we expect today?" She smiled at Harry's question and her eyes glanced to me with a look that I took to mean I had a keeper, though I already knew that.