Author: butterballporkbun
Genre: Paranormal
No. of chapter read: 6
First Impression: I'm expecting little brass toy soldiers. I'm getting killer dolls. I like killer dolls better.
Cover: The hell is that? A little mill? A soul sucking portal? A castle in the sky? Dafuq? Light eating up everything? It looks like elf fantasy. I wouldn't have touched this with a twelve foot pole.
Cover rating: dafuq?
Blurb: Buahahahaha! This is so funny and creepy and after you start to read, it kinda fits the story, but before that... what in the name of Merlin's soggy left testicle is going on in this book? Anabelle and Chucky... is that you?
Blurb rating: Ha ha ha ha!
Let's get it on!
Second impression: Holy crap this shit is crazy. And I love it.
Actual review (drum roll please):
Language: is good, coherent and takes a complete nosedive after chapter 2. People, people, people... Punctuation saves lives and actually helps your uncle Jack off a horse. Don't treat it like a minor thing.
Other then the odd (everywhere) punctuation missing, I can't complain. I can actually read without getting too distracted, so not complaining. Can I say complaining one more time? Complaining!
Language rating: edit some more, pls, or I'll send you a doll who can do it for you.
Plot: This is one of those books which I love stumbling upon. You see, there's this prologue that points at stuff, but I'm going to jump right over that and get to the good stuff.
There's this girl Corina and she's apparently in the loony bin because... dolls attack her. That's right, evil little dolls attack her when nobody's looking. And she has a stuffed cat named Opal who protects her.
Then there's this living, life-size doll named Taiga who thinks/knows Corina is actually his former master, the one that he killed and he wants to figure out what the hell is going on (don't we all). Fun, fun, fun...
Plot rating: OMG, the concept is hilarious!
Characters:
Corina: Can see killer dolls and is attacked and knows she's not crazy, but still gets shock therapy. I feel sorry for her and like her. She's a really interesting protagonist.
Taiga: Is a bigass doll who stitches himself and thinks Corina is his master (she probably is). Right now, he's just as confused as anybody in the story. Yay for randomness and confusion!
Nurses: are trying very hard to ignore the spooky living toys they see all around them. They must be tired.
Opal: coughs up keys. Awesome stuffed kitty. Apparently tore Taiga up pretty badly so I'm curious to see if he's a good kitty or a bad kitty. So far, he's an awesomely interesting kitty.
Killer dolls: Yay for killer dolls!
Doctor what's his face: Will probably get his face chewed off by killer dolls soon. Looking forward to it.
Character rating: Yay for confused characters!
Why I stopped reading: Because the randomness appeals to me. I'm having so much fun with this and will most likely read it all at some point.
Grade: Pass. Just for being completely and utterly psychedelic! You may add the [I survived the most BRUTAL review] thingie to your blurb. Enjoy your obscure doll reference song. I dare you to tell me you knew it.
YOU ARE READING
The Evil Rant And Review Book
Random[CLOSED] Formerly The Evil Reading Request List, this has turned into a showcase of nasty reviews, a place for me to rant. I surprisingly don't rant a lot. The book was discontinued because real life is kicking my butt and I don't have the tim...
