Author: haleyogurt
Genre: Teen Fiction
No. of chapter read: 3
First Impression: Ha! There's a pun in the title. Ha!
Cover: Chopstix. That is all. No, really, rise and chopsticks. Isn't that like a little racist? Is it wrong that I find it funny? Probably, but I tend to laugh at the most inappropriate stuff. Like my reviews. You should all know by now that my sense of humor is seriously fucked up.
Cover rating: Ha! Another pun.
Blurb: I want to really, really, really like it, but it's sorta really, really, really lazy. Fortunately for you, dear Yogurt worshiper, I'm lazy as well, so I appreciate a good lazy blurb. Especially when it doesn't involve all hell breaking lose in high school or something. And I like that it starts with "In which" instead of "It's about" (Aboot, lol - yup, my sense of humor is seriously fucked up), which kinda hints at what I'll find inside.
I'm letting this one slide.
Blurb rating: keeping it simple
Let's get it on!
Second impression: Ah, the wonders of moving and starting a teen fic with the move. How utterly original.
Actual review (drum roll please):
Language: This is going to be a short one. You know why? Because the damn thing is good. You might've taken a freaking 10 months to upload the story, but you did a decent job when you did. You don't have awkward wording, major typos or major grammar and punctuation issues that would make me pull out the old Nazi hat.
So Nazi hat stays in drawer and rabid badgers are fed pickles instead. You know why?
Language rating: Pickles!
Plot: Who the bloody hell can fight with pickles and pretend they're light sabers? Have you ever seen a pickle? Those things are tiny! Or are these some mutant Canadian pickles, three foot long? And how did they manage to break a jar? Were they actually fighting with pickle jars?
*heavy breathing* Must. calm. down.
Okay, excuse the rant above, but I'm really curious!
Now, I'm going to take this here big mallet and hit you in the head with it because... *viciously rings cliche bell*
Let's see:
- MC moves from and awesome place where she had friends to... not such an awesome place where she has no friends,
- younger sibling adapts much faster, leaving MC lonely,
- meeting weird kids/potential friends on the first day,
- estranged best friends go on without MC.
Yup, that's a whole lotta cliche right there. *pulls out giant fly swatter* This looks like the typical teen fiction story. But, wait. There are a few redeeming things:
- MC is not a crazy loner
- MC doesn't attend a constant one person pity party
- There's no hot jerk sitting by MC, waiting to take her breath away
- MC's voice is actually pretty damn funny
- The action takes place in Canada
- MC is Asian, in case no one got that from the clever title.
*puts giant fly swatter away*
Plot rating: Cliche, but the fun type
Characters:
Claire: You know what? I really enjoyed being inside her head, because she reminds me a lot of one of my friends (she's currently in Amsterdam being totally cool and friendless). I like her. I'm rooting for her. And her social awkwardness is endearing instead of annoying. I don't really care that she's in the most cliche of situations, because I think she'll do great.
Other characters: believe it or not, I'm lazy to list them this time, but I enjoyed all of them. From the mother, to the sister to the weird ass trio Claire is too afraid to join for lunch, to the full of themselves bimbos she does join. They're well done. And that's a big plus when it comes to novels set in high school. If there's no humor and impeccable writing, I'm not touching them.
This story has both.
Character rating: Fun.
Why I stopped reading: Alas, I have a giant review list waiting. So I stop reading when I make up my mind about a book. I did about this one. It's fun enough. It's going into may overgrowing To read pile.
Grade: Pas. Because, even if it's full of cliches, it treats them in a fun way. And I actually want to see what high school in Canada is like. Good job! You may add the sticker to your cover and the #isurvivedthemostbrutalreview tag to your story. I encourage both, since the sticker is awesome.
Regarding the song: Sorry, I couldn't help it.
YOU ARE READING
The Evil Rant And Review Book
Random[CLOSED] Formerly The Evil Reading Request List, this has turned into a showcase of nasty reviews, a place for me to rant. I surprisingly don't rant a lot. The book was discontinued because real life is kicking my butt and I don't have the tim...
