Have No Emotion, Show No Weakness

Always About You

Connie remained sitting with Grace for a while before noticing Jacob had come back inside. He picked up some folders and looked through them as though nothing was going on.

"Go Mum, it's okay."  Connie looked back down at Grace not willing to go but knew she should. She placed a kiss to Grace's forehead before pushing up off the sofa.

"Staff Nurse-" "I'm busy."  He walked past Connie nudging her gently. "Staff Nurse Masters my office now-" "Nah you're alright, got things to do."  Connie glared across at him as he walked away. Charlie looked up to her as she finally pulled her eyes away from his back. "Everything oka-" "Not now Charlie."

Connie disappeared into the department for half an hour before Zoe called her into resus. She rolled her eyes at Zoe's idea of 'emergency' normally but she wasn't expecting the site before her.

Jacob had grabbed someone by their shirt and was forcing them to look down at the patient. "Staff Nurse Masters!"  He didn't listen to her but carried on. "Look, this is your fault."  Jacob twisted the mans arm as Connie walked towards them.

She pulled Jacob's hand away from the other man causing him to look up at her. "Take a break, now."  He looked at Connie with a sheer look of disgust. "You can't tell-" "I'm your boss Staff Nurse Masters if nothing else! Either take a break or go to my office."

The other man was smiling across at Jacob causing him to almost lose his temper again. He stepped forwards before Connie got in his way. "That's it get out of my department now!"  She looked at the man who Jacob was close to hitting as he wandered out of resus.

She spun round to look up at Jacob. "You know I expected a little more from you but I guess I was wrong-" "Oh don't talk to me about being wrong, you'd know all about that." Connie glared up at him as he stepped back from her. "A little respect wouldn't go a miss-" "Respect? If you deserved it maybe."  Connie slapped him before watching as he looked back to her. "Get out of here now Staff Nurse Masters before I make a decision I'm sure you won't like."

Jacob couldn't believe this. He sighed shaking his head and stormed out of resus. Zoe was left confused as to what had happened between the pair as Connie placed a hand to her forehead. "Is some-" "Just get back to work Dr Hanna!"  Connie walked past her and went straight upstairs remembering Grace was in her office.

Several hours later Connie had somewhat calmed down and decided to try phoning Jacob. She took her phone out as she wandered out of the on call room. It just rang until his voicemail cut in. Connie shoved her phone back in her pocket before walking outside for some fresh air.

Jacob stood with his back against the wall. He stared off into the distance wishing she'd told him. He could hear her coming before he saw her walk outside. She looked exhausted, this couldn't be doing any good for her but it was her own doing.

Connie stood outside letting the cool air breeze over her. Today could not have been any worse. She felt the tears pricking at her eyes before they rolled down her cheeks. Jacob moved slightly causing her to bring her hands to her face and wipe away any evidence of crying before glancing to him.

She was shocked to see him still here. Since their argument in resus she hadn't seen him and had assumed he'd gone home. They both looked at each other for a moment before she wandered over to him.

"Listen if you're about to have this whole chat about my unacceptable behaviour in resus-" "I'm not, but I probably should apologise for my part in it..." He looked away from her as she leant against the wall. "You shouldn't have found out like that, I'm sorry." 

Jacob looked back at her seeing tears build in her eyes. "I don't understand what's so complicated Con, we love each other-" "Love isn't enough when a child is involved Jacob. I can't cope with another baby, not after what happened with Grace."

He looked across at her. "So what, you're just going to get rid of it and ignore what I want-" "I would never do that... I can't stop you from wanting this baby, and I won't. But I can't promise to be a part of all this. Some little happy family-" "Con, don't do this. You're not alone."  Jacob moved forwards and took her hands in his. "Please, I can't promise it to be easy but we could do this."

He stepped even closer all anger disappearing from him. He placed a hand to her cheek as the tears spilled over and fell down her cheeks. "Jacob I can't..."  He shook his head looking down at her. "All I've ever wanted is to find someone I loved more than anything, and I've done that... Having a baby with you is all I could ever want."

Connie wanted this baby more than anything but with her past experiences she couldn't do anything but worry. "Is this why you've been so funny lately-" "I'm sorry, I really am... I just need some time to get my head round this."  Jacob nodded as she let go of his hand and wiped her hands across her face as they heard Grace's voice behind them.

"Mum?"  "Hey baby..."  Connie bent down to her level and Grace knew she'd been crying but didn't bring it up. "Jacob's gonna take you home okay? I've got some work to finish here but he'll look after you."  Connie pressed a kiss to Grace's head before standing up.

"I need to get back inside."  She glanced at Jacob who had taken Grace's hand in his. "Con-" "I'll speak to you later Jacob, sorry." He watched as she walked back inside carrying the world on her shoulders. "Come on then you, pizza and a film?"  Grace smiled as they walked towards his car, he just hoped she came home tonight.