Run

Talk...

Sina

Kush smoke lingering in the air from the blunt I just finished, I was lifted but that didn't take away the stress that I've been enduring. My mind was fucked up for the most part. Smashing the roach of the blunt into the empty styrofoam cup that once held lean, I rested my back against the couch. Faint gunshots sounded throughout the Nola, the usual around these parts.

As these series of events transpired, the only thing I actually wanted at the moment was a peace of mind and that was something that no weed nor drank could help with but something I could only get from a woman but not just any woman. Everything I ever said would be contradictory of what I said about the only woman that comes to mind at the moment...

I sighed before closing my eyes and pinching the bridge of my nose. My thoughts were all fucked up, it was difficult to think when all you heard was nothing but gunshots and sirens, I'm used to it but I'm tired of hearing it. The killer part is that with all of this shit going on with me, every homicide that happened out here will more than likely be put on me, involving me or not, these opps want me away for life, either locked up or dead. It doesn't sit right with me but when you're in this game with your name out there, it's never easy to dodge the bullet, metaphorically speaking, that is...

Opening my eyes, I took my fingers from the bridge of my nose and stood to my feet. I walked over to the old floor lamp in the corner of my living room and turned it off before making my way down the hall. I walked into my bedroom and grabbed my notebook off of my dresser before taking a seat on my bed. Sitting the notebook on my lap, I reached over and grabbed my headphones that rested upon my pillow. I placed them on my head before reaching into my pants pocket for my cell. I plugged my headphones into my cell as I began to scroll my cell for this instrumental I made a few months ago. Once I found it, I let it sound through the speakers. I opened up my notebook before grabbing the black ink pen from the spirals of the book.

As I let the beat ride my mind, I tapped the blank sheet of the notebook with my pen. I hummed a bit as I caught the harmony that I wanted to use. I started the beat over and began to write what I conjured up in my mind. I bobbed my head to the beat as I started the beat over once again. "Word got around that a nigga got shot, heard a nigga drew down and he bucked so his ass got popped", I sang as I stopped the music.

I grew frustrated so I scratched it out and wrote something else. I turned the beat on and hummed it before voicing it. "No one told me life would be this way. I swear nobody told me. Guess this is the game we chose to play. Crazy how it's always been the same. People dying every day, that ain't nothing new when you from downtown.", I sang as I let the beat ride. Without writing any longer, I just sang what spilled from my mind. "Phone just rang heard a nigga got, got. He was over in the east last thing that he heard, 6 shots. He ain't gettin no love from the cops, nobody got caught. Real talk when I heard who it was, heart damn near stopped...", I stopped as I threw my notebook across the room and snatched my headphones off.

"Fuck this shit", I said as I placed my face in my palms. I grew vulnerable as my thoughts led to what I was actually trying to make a song about. I'm fucked up because of this and ever since then it's been more adding to it, back to back. As I dwelled more into my thoughts, my phone rang. I sat up and gazed at my cell to see that it was Devin calling. I pulled the headphones out of my phone before answering. Placing it to my ear, I spoke. "What's goin on yungin?", I queried.

"Shit, I wanted to have a talk with ya, if that's cool yung. I was gonna stop by.", He spoke into the phone.

"Yeah, that's cool", I said.